GOT back from the gym, Natalie is still crazy, no real routines only makes it up as you go and its tough to follow, the music I will admit was a little better this time. But I had a rough time, I couldn't follow so well plus I was worried they were doing step and don't think that is good for me at this time to try to go up an down a step at ninty miles an hour and spin!
I hate step... tired!
Helen showed up and of course didn't do a whole lot just sorta pretended she was working out! After she asked why the sad face, I guess it was showing I tried not to.
So I explained and dang it if I didn't cry.
She invited me to coffee at rosies for a morning talk. So I went. We did talk she told me that many people love me, and to not be sad. YES I UNDERSTAND but I have a need, and it hasn't been filled in a long long long time.

With out a doubt, something is not right . I have to see for my self why I should be alone with out a mate, a partner a lover a man. PERPLEXING, troublesome. And down right stupid!~~

I am not dumb I don't think by any means, I still have some good looks, so others say.. I try to be humorous, funny and candid. Pretty darn clean and organized?? umm I cook like a chef, I have made myself do all sorts of things, in life I have done much... so I am not one bit lazy... I love my children although there us times I feel I wasn't the best mom. No crazy life style? I don't get it! I use to be a pretty darn good designer too, shit I can do anything JUST ABOUT!!! I am not insecure! so what the heck?


Yesterday was a fun day, it began by driving the winedy road to San Jose. I had to go a show room to pick out all the interior essentials for another house I am working on. It was very nice Show room. Diaza is what it was called. I spent two hours picking out product , Helen running around like she owned the place and Arja and Eric, walked and found a cool bakery in Aluejuala.

We then left to go to San Pedro a suburb of San Jose. We were going to go and look at car's for them but it just didn't happen. I drove but really didn't find any used car lots. I felt bad, I wanted Eric to have a good time. He did stop at office depot and bought a mic for this computer. We went further now to another area of San Pedro and went shopping a little. Eric became sick, and wanted to sleep in the car. He has this chest infection thing going on where he feels miserable and coughs a lot. So us girls go and shop around, it begins to pour rain while were in the store so walking on the street is now not an option. Later in the Evening I took them to Escazu to eat at Novillo Alegre. It is an Argentina restuarant that has outstanding Steak or meat .. the kabobs we had for appetizers were scrumptious, and the steak I had with wine and garlic was sublime, melted in your mouth. I had a quick flash back of Milo and I sitting there and enjoying, while trying to get Arja and Eric to tell me what they thought?

It was a wonderfull dinner, expensive, I paid for Helen and I we had three drinks each, hors de orves, and salads, dinner. It came to $78 dollars. But it was well worth it and a great experience for them.

The ride back to Jaco seemed to fly, Helen and I talked the whole time and laughed our heads off... We had so much fun Eric mentioned how fast we made it back. I explained that the incline on the way to San Jose is much steeper, and with the no powered chinese wagon I have.. it barely makes it up the Hill (sure Brandon will laugh at this) I asked everyone to lean forward to take the weight off the back.. This comes as a joke? ok? then I actually made pushing motions but it didn't help the car get up the hill any faster, But on the way back the incline is going in the Jaco direction, so you go much faster and not as much shifting.

We stopped in Orotina around 9:00 and got and exchange fo some of Arja's previous purchases. Some Candy she bought was old, so I stopped and she exchanged it.

I did buy a guanabana, big green lucious fruit, three mangos, and some hocotes in Orotina when we were coming to San Jose. We all bought things so this was the stop to exchange.

Then onward to Jaco, WOW a lot of men at the beetles bar, this is a prostitue bar... everyone knows about it. IT was packed... thinking about that now. May be the reason I got so depressed about my situation. SINGLE AGAIN