The changes in life

When something drastic, or something unexpected happens in life, all people react differently. I think the majoirty of us go into denial, then acceptance. Or some just lie down a and never recovery. Others are calm, and try to understand why or how this could happen. Then slowy move on and eventually recover from mal situations. Then there are fighters, that resist to lie down. They are fighting from the moment of the diaster. I think I am a combination of two of these examples. Fighter and slowly move on.

Being in the state's I was only one of these but living here has opened up my eyes to many things. First to be more grateful for everything I have, that I can walk number one. After my accident on the bike breaking the leg in several places on my birthday no less! made me realize that walking and dancing (one of my passions in life) is a gift. Thanking god for being well, and having strong will to survive and heal a body that was threatened to be removed. Yes they wanted to remove the foot because I caught a flesh eating bacteria. But my will did not allow that to happen. I told the foot to heal, and I told my self to think positive and make it well, for the simple fact that I LOVE TO DANCE!! and now I can. Only one example in the time I have lived here.

Losing things, work, limbs, money,friends, love ones, homes, or any possesion that you value is difficult. But for some reason unknown to most of us. It seems to work out. Maybe not in the time we want or expect but it does work out.

I seriously have been trying to be positive about the tinyest things to the most difficult. Not DREAMING but having positive thoughts about how it will get resolved.

I am not just talking about myself here, but the happenings in other peoples lives as well.

This whole adventure here in Costa Rica has been, surely unexpected, many drastic situations has happened to me but, from a USA stand point perspective. From a Costa Rican perspective its just life.

Things here are so different than in the states. Its slow, days pass with out one thing happening. It can take you months to get a phone, months to get internet. But my point is really is how we deal with the situations of life that comes.

Just getting someone to give you ride here is a huge ordeal. But getting angry over it or frustrated only makes it worse.


I am learning that keeping a smile on your face not being fake but believeing that there is something to smile about helps get through the rough situations. Believing that good things are coming everyday, putting your in your mind that you deserve good, that all things that happen are not always your fault but a reason of life behind the bad situation should. Trying to take what is bad and make something good out it.

I am learning how to put that smile on my face and be greatfull for the smallest things. I find that most of the Americans that I meet here are really over induldged. That they complain about everything. NOT THAT I AM BETTER AT ALL, I was a complainer too.. I do not believe as bad as some I meet here. BUt I did. Now with being stripped of all mannor of things. No work, hardly having food, No car having to rely on my two feet,( WHICH IS A BLESSING I STILL HAVE) living modestly with out many possesions. Has made me realize how blessed I was before I came here. Although those things do not make the person, its the doing without that makes you become a person you never knew.

I want that this is a good example to others.. I have the power to influence others not only through this page, but personally and in my other writings. The reason I said this a is my page here in Jaco is called Inspirations for Life and living in Costa Rica, I have to come up with a reason to be inspired to live here every month.

LET ME TELL YOU THAT IS NOT EASY WITH THE LIFE SITUATIONS I HAVE BEEN FACED WITH HERE.. but somehow I manage to pull a rabbit out of my hat and inspire not only others but MYSELF AS WELL after I write it.

My friend last night for example, we were together in a place here in Jaco, she was bored, I wasn't We were talking to people, I stopped her said put a smile on your face and at least act like your having fun! We shouldn't leave yet. She looked at me and said how is it that you have so much power in you?
She began telling these people we were with, about me? I didn't know she felt like this?

She said "This Woman is beautiful look at her every day she dresses nice, puts her makeup on and looks pretty, She has so much energy, goes to bed late and gets up bright sometimes at 6:00, drinks coffee and wants to scoot out RIGHT AWAY". "She dances all night long when were together, never tiring of dance. She can do anything this woman" Wow! then she said and do you know how old she is going to be? The people are looking at me, I am laughing and smileing.. she said 54 look at her.. goes and goes, and trys to do something everyday to make it. She looked at me and said I hope When I am her age I can be that alive!"

Ok so that was my purpose, she has been watching me through all this crap that has been happening. And it was an inspiration to her.
Another one of my friends the other day lost this girl he was seeing. He was down, taking pills, he owns a restaurant.. telling me all these crazy things. I stopped him said look at who you are? YOUR A BUSINESS MAN, your on top not below this girl.. let her see you strong not weak like you are right now. I talked to him more than a hour. By the end he was energized. SAID THANK GOD FOR YOU Marianna... and when I walked back to my house some 20 minutes away. I said Thank god for my life. Its not easy it has been so rough so strange, something I am not familiar to but God really has made me a special person.

And I am greatfull for the the teachings I had when I was young. That I am worth something, that I can do things when I put my mind to it. Understanding all these happenings is not possible. But its the dealing that is.

I am not going to lie and say everything is perfect in my life its far from that if not at all. But I will say I am finding happiness in little things. AND HOPEFULL it will pull me out of this mire, and build me to be a much better person.

I am not sitting home crying, I m getting up moving and doing things as though I have a purpose.

Ok this weekend, there is a huge Concert, I was going to bake lots of things but No one will take me to the store. I only have a few dollars anyway. So maybe its not meant for me to do it. But I did rent my apartment to a couple for the weekend. I have two rooms so they can have mine. All the hotels apartments everything is full so I made $150 bucks for the weekend! I also have another plan as well. After Sunday I will be going to Puerto Jimenez for the Interview live. IT takes hours to get there on the bus. But I am sure I will enjoy the ride and the views. I have a freind who may assist me on the ride. I will know tomorrow.

Friday is my birthday but no plans. I am proud to be my age and look and feel the way I do.. so that is a celebration in itself.

Try to everyday be thankfull for one thing. This might make a difference in how you live