Waking up to Ice and fog at Clints

I spent the night at Clints, when I woke up it was ice and fog, thank God it was nice and warm. In fact I was sweating in the night. I had to get up and take off clothing because I was so hot.
I decided yesterday that when Brandon and his girlfriend came back that I would leave. I felt uncomfortable there, I didn't want to intrude.

When I arrived from shopping for Eungena and upon entering Brandon's house, no real greeting to me. I sat for a moment alone in the kitchen and thought this is uncomfortable its best I leave, visit other people. Sounds strange, but this is how I felt. I understand what it is there. I realize our fractured relationship is way to painful to me. I want to be in peace with my son, and have a loving relation but it never happens. I try to be sweet, and kind, but it just never happens. I want to say more but its better that I don't. So I right away got my bag and used his truck to go to Clints, I said thank you for everything and that I would come by Tomorrow. He wanted me to Cook dinner and I will, but I want to talk to him before then.

I am drinking nice coffee, that Clint found here that tastes exactly like Costa Rican Coffee. The latins and Italians know how to make good coffee, this is exactaly like what I am use to now.

I plan on Seeing Sharons, house tonight. I still have a few of my things in her storage, so I may try to see what I can bring back with me.

Its been different this time, I actually saw people. Earlier in the week, Jon Dickie came by we visited Clint, looked at Photos I had in the computer for Clint from Costa Rica, and had a nice time. Then an old Boy friend Paul, called all over looking for me, I called him From Jazzercise one morning, and late that night about 12:30 he showed up at my sons Brandon's house. That was late I was sleeping but I woke up to talk to him. He brought mojitos and we talked, laughed, and drank a couple. It was the night before Thanksgiving. I passed out, being sick and well those drinks were strong. But we had a nice time.. it was great to see him and laugh and talk about old stuff. He fell asleep too but left before I woke up.
Then the following night after visitng with my son for Thanksgiving, Cade came by, that is already stated in earlier blog.
Then Sharon and I have been talking and seeing each other alot, eating together. Its been nice. I visited with a couple of gals from my Jazzercise class as well.
Now I need to see Tina, I was going to stay there but she was gone, and its so cold I didn't know if I could bare to stay in the little cabins. But I am going to see her and thank her for sending me money. I want to see Bill white, and On Tuesday I will have lunch with him. Shirley Hanley was suppose to email but I have not heard.

Barbara did, but its so hard to get to Portland, I plan on going tomorrow to pick up a little bit more Ribbon, at a wholesale. So Maybe We can have lunch.But it has been better with friends this time.People say they miss me..

Still eating Turkey but alone In Brandons house

I been spending the nights here alone. The house is cold the temp is set and you can not change it so I have been trying to cuddle in blankets to stay warm. I also have been eating little by little the left over turkey and stuffing that is to die for. I forgot to say that I boil all the giblets with celery and sage onions, and poultry seasoning first then make a broth and add butter to it. Its really very good.. Everyone eats lots of it.

I have been trying to think about what I can do in Costa Rica to make money. Obviously the design work is not holding up well. The landscape was going good and it dropped off too.
I have been watching kitchen nightmares,which is my youngest sons favorite show. I have never heard of this show until this week, Now the reason I said I been watching this is because he is an inspiration to me. He turns failing restaurants around and makes them work and profit. I need someone to turn me around or give me inspiration on what I can do to make a huge change in my life.

The last comment on my blog, and I have no idea who it is, but they said I was a great cook and maybe that is my calling. It is my sons, he is awesome.. and I am pretty dang good too. I use to cater for people here some 400 one time in one day. Not plain food either very high end classy and tasty food.
I have offers often from Rossy and other people there to cook for them, Every time i cook I get standing ovations. It is natural, my mother was an Italian Julia Child no lie, she taught me pastries, pies, I mean fancy pastries, cakes, cookies Italian traditional things and the best food ever. So it is natural for me.

I laid on the sofa here last night and racked my brain on what???? Cook??? bake?? but you need a kitchen and oven and its very hot in Costa Rica... I want to do something that is a demand, like for an example this night mare kitchen dude... does demographics in areas there was a fine dinning restaurant, in an area where it mostly young people.So they changed the atmosphere and menu to suit younger crowd and turned it around.


Where I live is lots of Prostitutes, beautiful young women, lots of Old,chubby American men. Well men of all ages, lots of Surfers, young and old, male and female. Men and women of all ages that are ticos. I need to come up with something that targets these people. We have a sushi restaurant that is super expensive and its always packed not many locals but some of us go, and mostly Americans and some prostitutes with there dates. Also another high end restaurant that does excellent, The souvenir shops do well, the surf shops excellent and Rossy's coffee shop does very well, now she has two and a small grocery store.
We have a kfc, a subway, a quisnos, and three icecream shops. No juice bars,and there is another coffee shop. A baglemans that is barely hanging in there.

I don't know if I want to do food, catering, or something directed to the women in town. I had a letter this week from the Jazzercise corporate, asking me to come to a workshop to become and jazzercise teacher but the franchise fees, and percentages that you have to pay will be probably as much as I would make. But doing my own thing might work as long as I figure out the sets before. The women here will go, but how many dang classes can one person teach in a day?? NOT VERY MANY there fore this is a nice idea but not really much money. Or something directed to the surfers? how bout a service for the men who come to buy the women? Or something to do with tourisum? I dont kmow but all I know that after this last visit. I Have to live somewhere warm and sunny. This place is to depressing, and way to cold for me I am like a popcycle here.CAN NOT THAW out!

Suggestions would be perfect. Because I do not want to move back here at all. There is nothing for me here. No interaction, too much traffic, the costs of things wow!
So anyhowwwwwwwwwww. Thank you who ever you are that said you love me. I needed to hear that!

Well going into Portland to find some clothes for Eugenia, this gal that works for rosie she gave me a small amount of money so I need to go look for her.
My son is making Turkey soup and invited me but its so dang far to his house and I already spent too much on gas. So I have no idea what I am doing today but I hope its getting warm sometime today.

Another pretty day but don't go out side!

It is pretty again, but its 32 degrees which is freezing. I have been so sick, bad cough, bronchitus, and cold combo. Body aches head aches and my nose is so raw from the cold. I sleep on the sofa at my oldest sons house and I bout froze last night.I have been here alone for two days. I went yesterday and spend Thanksgiving with Jordan, Nancy, Julian my 2 year old grandson, Nancy's Brother Jim, and My friend Clint.
I cooked a simple dinner compared to past years. I turkey that was given to us by Jordan's Boss at the restuarant. Corn bread stuffing with fresh sage, apples, onions, celery and poultry seasoning. Its the best! not mushy and I stuff it in the Turkey it was great! On the turkey I put rock sea salt, garlic, cracked pepper and butter. It was perfect, not dry at all and the skin was delicous! we made fresh greenbeans, salad, mashed potatos, and yams with lemon, orange cinamom, a small amount of brown sugar, like a quarter of a cup, and few marshmellows. That was all no desserts. I was happy to spend it with my grandson. He is so sweet, really happy, smiles constant. Has a really beautiful character.Doesn't cry mnuch at all, and he is very talkative! Nancy is doing a great job teaching mannors.

I have photos and will post them as soon as Clint and I can get line.
I came home late and let Brandon's Dog Jarvus the bulldog out and watched some TV, then Brandon's friend Cade came by last night to visit with me.
I have been good friends with him for years. He is a good guy and He kinda reminds me of Justin Timberlake who I LOVE!!! although Cade can't dance or sing!
He is a special friend for me, he has been faithfrull friend to my son for years.
He was like one of mine for a long time.
He is 31 years old and has his life in order.
Well Today I planned on going to Jazzercise since I can't do that in Costa Rica, butI slept to late God!! I woke up at nine.. never do that at home. Its just too cold to get up.
I may take the kids to town they don't have a car,and would be nice to spend time with Jordan since he is off today, and Brandon is still in Coos bay.

Sunshine and the Rose parade

Waking up this morning to the sun was a blessing. I love to wake up and see the sun shining. What a beautiful day today is. My only wish at this moment is to be surrounded with family or Friends to share our day and reasons for being thankful.

Later today I will share with Jordan, his girlfriend Nancy, her Brother
Jim, A friend Clint and my grandson Julian.

For years a tradition in my family was to wake up early all get together and first watch the Rose parade, while we prepare the food for the day. Today the tradition has not carried on. I woke up alone on the sofa of my oldest sons home, made some coffee, let his dog out and turned on the news.
Then the Rose parade came on I have such good memories of this day with my family. I will remember this one as a strange and very unusual day of giving thanks.

I had a comment on last nights blog about being thankful for the things we have.

Believe me This is not the only day I thank God or tell others that I am Thankful for whatever I have. Daily I thank God .. for all the blessings in my life.

I have had some real struggles,I have had life threatening health situations, brushes with illness that could have caused death, but yet I am here still alive! looking like the picture of health. Grateful that I have been giving a body or face that is resilient, the normal person would not believe the types of diseases and situations I have endured.

I have had dangerous situations where my security, and life was threatened. I have been attacked a number of times and yet survived, because I am a survivor! Grateful for the strenght that I have been graciously given.

The talent that was put into my hands, and my mind that gave me the ability to make a living on my own.

That I have two handsome sons, who are not drug addicts, thieves, or idolaters. both are motivated to achieve but at different levels. Grateful that they are who they are.

For all those people I care about in the USA I wish you a Happy Thanksgiving, say to you Most of you are very blessed.

One thought I had yesterday while I was shopping in the Costco in Portland... I saw all the incredible things in Costco and how so many people take the opportunity to shop. Consider this only my thoughts... being that I am living in a country where its not so rich..
(Mind you I know and realize there are many countries that do not share what we as Americans have) and although Costa Rica is not super poverty country is it not as indulged as USA. Ok so my realizations was Wow I have not been exposed to such excess, I forget how blessed I was here when I lived here. Not that I am holy because I have this attitude now but I so greatly appreciate things and I wish I could share these ideas with others.

I was shopping it was for Ribbon and some paper to bring back for the holiday job I have with the Los suenos. It's hard to find Ribbon, and paper that is nice. Simple things that we Americans take for granted are a novelty there so I was thrilled to find the beautiful things I found! I didn't have money to buy anything for someone else or myself, but I saw things I would love to have been able to bring back to enjoy. I saw many things I wished I could have bought for a couple of my friends and people I know.
And so My thought was WOW How lucky I was when I use to live her but I didn't realize how lucky and now although I live in Costa Rica, I am grateful for the opportunity to return and do Material things here in the USA.

It really is a Material world here.

Enough of that!! well I am off to Jordan's my young sons apartment. I have food in the car that I will prepare. Its the most simple Thanksgiving, but I am going to make sure I enjoy it and tell Jordan, Nancy, Clint, and Jim.. To let me know what they are grateful for. I plan on making this a nice day for them, and forget my sorrows of not being able to be with all my family, only two my son and my grandson, and two friends.

I may try to run by Sharon's, there house is full on all the holidays and it is a reminder of the years past when all my family use to be together...

Happy Thanksgiving and I wish many blessings on those of you who are in need.

Thanksgiving is not the same any more

This is so strange, I am sure I am going to get bad comments on this one but Its my thoughts and this is basically about my life and what goes on in it.

I flew for 16 hours to Vancouver Washington, I really was not sure about staying at my oldest sons house, A friend of Mine Tina offered for me to stay in here cabinas and I was going to but it worked out for while to stay at my sons. They my son and his girlfriend, wanted me to go to my sisters which is 5 or more hours away from Vancouver. My sister has not talked to me or emailed me in more than year and half.

The last letter was bad, said hurt full things and I never responded to it. Siblings often have issues. Mine with her is always different. This time she thought I had lost my mind to move to Costa Rica and made it clear that I was off my rocker. So since then I have not written to her. So I felt why would I want to go and be in her home durning Thanksgiving when I flew here to be with my sons their families... my grandchildren.These are my true thoughts! They decided to go there, I was going to stay at the other sons house for a couple of days but I found out that the brother of the girlfriend is with out a job and was staying for a short time at his home.So I felt uncomfortable staying in there small apartment two room with baby,my son his girlfriend and the brother.

I wanted to try to figure out how to spend Thanksgiving with the two but it has not worked out. The younger was upset, as I have not been with him for his birthdays, Christmas for three seasons, and wanted to spend Thanksgiving day with me.

He is a chef, the restaurant he works for, has over 2000 reservations and he gets off work at 4:00. My idea was well, you must not want to come home and help Mom cook for Thanksgiving? Why don't we celebrate on Sat giving you a day to rest. And I would loose my pride, be nice and go with the oldest son and his girlfriend to my sisters and her husbands. That would satisfy My son, renew the bond with my sister AGAIN... (I have done it before many times....) and be able to have a dinner and nice day with my youngest.
DIDN'T WORK.

The oldest was not upset that I had decided not to go, but to stay with the younger and make dinner with him. He was understanding and good about it. But the younger didn't have money to purchase the things we needed so I paid what little I had and got some things for us to cook tomorrow.
The older left in the day to my sisters. I felt sad I really wanted some how to be with both, either one on one day and one on another since they don't really associate.

Very difficult situation.

Well today after I went to Jazzercise, Sharon taught I went to my sons home, and they were preparing to leave. I showered and ran into Portland to the Costco. Then I drove to Woodland to see the younger son after he got off work and to take him to the store to buy the dinner needs.
We visited and he decided it was best I go buy the things and go early tomorrow to cook.
I had taken Clint with me to visit, then dropped him off after we went to the grocery store. While driving to my sons house I had a thought. First I was sad they left to my sisters with out me and that we all can't be together because of the strain on the relations. Then I thought I wonder if they locked the house up and I have no key? My clothes all my things were in the house locked up.
Nothing was mentioned when I said good by earlier, have a nice trip, enjoy your time there. But they had to have seen my suitcase next to the door?

They locked the house just like I thought without a note or key and now it is dark and very cold. I have to add I been ill since I arrived bad cold or flu or something but Its miserable. The cold weather to me is unbearable and I have no clothes for it no socks nothing. Just a small sweater and short jacket.So now I driving in the little truck he let me use. I come to the driveway and see his car in the drive. I think, I bet its totally locked and now I am screwed!! First I am feeling left out ok Maybe it is incorrect but in my mind its kinda strange that I fly here to see them and they go off. So My hunch was correct. Everything is locked up tight. I panic a little because its dark very cold and I feel sick.Not to say sad too.

So I walk around the house to see possibly a window something open so I can get my things and get in the warm. But no.
I walk next door thinking maybe the neighbor has a key. I knock knock knock... not home. I don't have a phone or a way to call anyone.
I see the lights on in a house across the culti sac.. remembered they had a dog and possibly the dog may be there and she or he might know who in the neighborhood has a key (WHY WASN'T ONE GIVEN TO ME or something?) This young lady answers and just stares at me I say Hello I am Brandon's Mom, and I am locked out of there house. All my things are in there. She said I have the key. I replied OH GOOD, she didn't smile or even respond she said I can Unlock it for you... I stood there and looked at her she was not allowing me to have the key? In shock now and thinking ok this is very weird. I Said Well I am his mom and all my things are there and I need the key, she then handed me the key.
She never said a word, not a hello nor a good bye? so I walked across the way and was stunned while I walked. Rather pist to say the least. I thought wow! what if I didn't walk over there, how did I know that this house would have a key? and if I didn't I would be stuck out in the cold for four days with no clothes until they returned. I could have gone to Tina's but I would have no clothes, no toothbrush, hair brush makeup nothing!!! Maybe it was my fault, I didn't ask but generally I have a way to get in. This time nothing was said, nor offered. I just feel like this is not the way I want or should be treated?

Now I am sitting alone in my sons home, warm but sad.

I am a clean person, neat orderly, respect other peoples property. I am not abuser, drug user, or alcoholic. I try to be kind, I try to be helpful and think of other people. I can not understand what my life is. I feel at this moment I really have no reason. Maybe it was just an over site, but I put myself in the place if it was my mom would I do this to her? NEVER!!

I similar situation the other night at the youngest sons. I went to see him for the first time since I arrived. Its a long way from Vancouver. The oldest let me borrow the truck to go. We chatted for a few minutes and he took off with his friends to play Xbox till three am. I realize he is young 23 years old and maybe didn't feel that was so bad. But I drove all the way to see him, hadn't seen him in months, and he was the one that threw the fit about me going with the oldest.. So that was rude, I said nothing about it. I just went back to the oldest's house which is 45 minutes away.
Feeling again sad about his behavior. Never would I do that to my mother after she drove to see me, and flew from a long way away.

Thanks giving is not the same.. my heart right now is breaking. I have to share that I cried on the plane trying to figure out how I would spend this holiday with my sons and family. And it was true it is a sad situation... maybe not for them but for me its very sad. There is no relationships, I guess the moving away caused that? but before I left it was not the same it was only one part of the reason I moved to Costa Rica. Too much drama, too much pain. I thought perhaps, the separation, would make them realize that you only have one mother. But I see it has not changed.

I really think that after this trip, I may not return. Until they can come and see me if they choose.

Here's the video I am in

Thanks giving in the USA

I flew in the on Sat wow what a day that was, three hours from San Jose up at 5:30 but first to bed at one. Then the flight was at 7:45 barely made it to the airport on time had about 20
minutes to get ready to board. Then three hours on the plane it was fine I slept some and the chair next to me was empty so it was peace full and nice.Then To Houston, from the moment in the airport problems. Immigration stopped me because I did not have my sons phone or address. He doesn't have a cell he tossed it, and then house i don't know why but anyway they didn't like that and took me in for questioning. Wasn't fun, then Six hours in the airport with no one and nothing to do. It was really cold in there and I began to feel sick. I walked the whole airport god only knows how many times. I was so bored. I really didn't meet people this time. too many tourists and more travelers than I have seen recently.

I stayed in one bar for a while for like three hours didn't drink but ate some chili and had a coffee bought for me by a nice man from Chicago, going to Managua in Nicaragua. He had a girlfriend there and a home, and likes all the central American countries.

He talked allot I listened, I was pretty reserved this time, one reason was thinking about how I would deal with Thanksgiving with my sons not really associating, my sister who invited them down and I don't really want to go there. Then the cold air conditioning making me feel sick. And for some reason this time being alone, no money.

I just listened smiled and little as I could interaction.

After the 6 hours layover, I boarded only to sit on the plane in the runway for more than 40 minutes waiting on someone who was wandering around the airport. Then four hours on that plane, It was cold i was uncomfortable and worried about where I am staying and what I am doing and how Thanksgiving was going to be. Just felt sad

I was really tired not much sleep the two nights before, then shopping like a mad woman right before the flight because The Los suenos finally gave the deposit at 2:30 the day before. Leaving me only a few hours to buy things for the hotel before I flew off.

It was mad but I did it.

Then It was only Brandon and Cade who came to get me. We had gone to the applebys for a snack and a margarita and had a really nice talk.
I love my sons, I miss them it was nice to talk with him.
Then Yesterday Sara and I went and did some mini shopping, only looking mostly I bought a pair of socks its so cold. I heard there is snow warnings and they had snow just short of Vancouver here in the foot hills.
I hate this weather I am not kidding. I am already sick. I have a sort of laryngitis I can't seem to talk well. My throat is sore and my body hurts. Its really cold to me my blood is so thin now from the warm tropical weather and sun all the time. I have not seen the sun since I left on Friday.
In the evening I went and saw Jordan and his girl and my Grandson Julian. He is a happy little boy and my son seems to be doing well.
I spent a few hours then came back to Brans.

Today I went to Jazzercise hardly anyone recognized me my hair is long and now blond,and I am a lot thinner than ever.
It was fun, not as fun as I remember. The routines seemed boring to me today.
But I talked with Sharon my friend we went and had breakfast and coffee. It was nice to see her, she is thin too and looks good! She use to be my very best friend.. but we don't communicate any more as much. She has a busy life. People in the USA are very busy and just don't take time for others. I was guilty too but I did try to make time for my friends and my boys when they weren't busy.
I don't have much to do I cleaned up the house here some and now I may change and tired to get warm and go to the Costco to check out new things. I use to love the Costco.. problem is no money.. you can't walk out of that place with out spending a couple hundred dollars like that!!

But I won't I don't have it to spend.
I did stop and see Clint he had four massages to do today, he looked very nice seemed sad missing Costa Rica and said he needed to sell his house. It sits on a corner with more than an half acre in very nice neighborhood that is developing the single family home across the street just sold for 450 thousand and the lot is nearly an eight of his I told him to list it at least that. It has a small house on it but its all land and its huge. He wants to go back to Costa Rica to live. He said he hates it here too. It is cold and lonely if your single I know for a fact it was horrible at times. Raining all the time, gray depressing, the power bills the phones god...

I don't want to move back but my work is so bad in Costa Rica now similar to the way it was four years ago before I moved there.. something has to break for me .I need an overhaul!!

Anyway Its Monday lets see what happens in the next ten days that I am here

Sunny weather again

The past three days have been super nice. We had sun and I went to the beach for two hours each day. I am not sure about today since the truck with the old Christmas decor is coming from San Jose for me to preview and figure out what I am doing with it. I may be going to this small town outside of Punta leona to pick up lights and a few other things depending on the check I am getting from Los Suenos. We found our branches I am going to customize, and today get a truck to pick them up an take them to an area near the Los for storage and paint.

I sure hope I figure How I am getting to San Jose Sat, since the plane leaves at 7:45, and its Two hours from here. That is a very early drive in the Morning! I want to go the night before but I don't know right now who is driving me. In the past Cristhian took me and or I took the bus. But then I would have to pay for the hotel and Right now hotel is not in the budget. This sounds so silly that I can not afford a hotel for one night??? and yet I am flying to the USA.

The ticket was purchased a long time ago, but I did have to pay a big transfer fee of two hundred dollars recently. I used rent money to do that.. Its been so bad. So unfortunately I am busted practically. I need to figure that part out right now. Funny thing is I have no clothes to bring. All my clothes are hot weather clothes. I have one pair of jeans that fit, two blouses and one little sweater. So my luggage will be fairly light. But I want to bring some trunks to take back holiday product to use at the Los Suenos, so lugging around two empty trunks on a bus Friday night might be what I am doing.

I plan on visiting several people while I am in the States, one is Jon Dickey long time friend, ex employee. Jon and I have a great rapore and I love his guts! The other is Clint of course, My Two sons most importantly and grand kids. I look forward to spending some time with them. I want to try to build a better relationship with these guys but its hard at times. Their lives are busy.
Then there is Bill White a great friend and old Client for the holidays. I Use to do such beautiful Christmas and other Holiday work for this man. What good memories I have about him and his family.
Then Patrick and Shirley Hanley, I became friends with them after I created this dream like Hollywood style wedding for them, It became a yearly thing to decorate there whole home, and we became friends through this. Shirley is a beautiful woman inside and out, I miss some of these people.
I sure hope I can get Sharon to give me an hour. People lives are so hectic in the states no time for anyone. Terry an old friend hasn't seen me in three years. I don't think he would recognize me if he did! Every time I fly to the states I get in contact with many people but only one or two come through.
I need to thank God today for one of my friends, Tina.. She is doing something special for me.With out asking she offered a hand and I was so happy.
I prayed so hard yesterday that God would send a blessing, open up doors of opportunities and allow me to get back on my feet.
The roller coaster ride I have been on is hard tiring if not stressful. So I need to say THANK YOU TINA!!

Amazing sometimes how things work.

So today is going to be a little hectic, but I am happy!! I want to be doing something other than worrying.

Its a beautiful day THANK GOD FOR IT!

Yesterday I had calls from several people here, Saying that they saw me on a special for the Kumbia All Starz, Its true I am in the new video, but they said the special on a music station on the television here shows the whole thing and shows me allot. The Video only has a small snip of me in the beginning, dancing of course! and you can see me in the background shots of the other parts. But it was cool because people called. I have Chanel 48 on right now waiting for the special so I can see what I look like dancing...

Raquel is being better I had a long talk with her and I sure hope nothing goes on while I am gone. I am going to make sure my landlord knows I am gone and a talk to a couple of my friends that know her and me. I want nothing bad when I return!!

I have been doing allot of thinking, Putting more holiday decorations at Rosie's because she loves it! and well had a nice dinner last night with some people I met here on Vacation they invited me for dinner and we all hung out.

I want to address the guy from Portugal who reads my blog and is coming here in November 23rd, I will be gone but back to Jaco Beach Costa Rica on the 28Th. So plan on coming to Jaco that weekend, and spend the rest of the time here in this area. There is lots to do. And be sure to email me so I can give you contact information.

Nice to meet some of the people that follow this crazy thing I do, Blogging.

I tried to go to the beach today in fact I did for a while, but it wasn't sunny so I laid in the bikini, breezes are cool now and it was very comfortable and rest full.

I went to a new office today to give a bid on furnishings, I know one of the people that work there and that's how the call came She sold me on what I do to the owner. Plus I got the Los Suenos Hotel!!!
I will be decorating the hotel for the holidays. It is one of the most Famous hotels here in the country next to the one that is San Jose but the los suenos is special. http://marriott.com/hotels/travel/sjols-los-suenos-marriott-ocean-and-golf-resort/

I really am happy about this, I know this will lead to many other jobs and a great connection with the community here and in Herradura.

So its been a nice weekend, last nights dinner was a good way to Celebrate, of course privately no one knew I was having my own little celebration toasting and thanking GOD for the opportunity!

I saw Lucas there last night, he made it a point to come over to the table and show me how nice he looked. We were at the Hicaco on the beach, first class excellent sea food.
Then I watched him walk back to his table and he was having a date with a beautiful blond in the corner. She was young around 35, for him anyway he is 70. I sorta smirked and well was a little peeved. She was very striking. So hmmmmmmmm

Getting ready to relax and sleep a little I may go somewhere tonight again or I may not I sure hope tomorrow brings sun and the BEACH!

finishing up the little display

Got fairly early but Raquel did too, she went with me to the soda and we had a very lite breakfast together. She is such a serious face always seeming mad.But its more like sad. She needs money too.But she is not resourceful and I am.
She doesn't care about much, its was rough yesterday because I flat out told her I needed the money and this was not working for me. She did a little incident in a store, like painting her nails with the paint, when I saw her doing that I asked why are you using that? she said its only 300 colones, I said you have three hundred? she said no but you do. I blew it, I said I am not your mother and I am not paying for your things.
She just doesn't care.

I picked up some more holiday stuff for Rosie and now she wants even more! That's good its not a ton of decorations but its a good reason for people to ask who did it?

After that I went to Ice, he called Tony and Tony said he would come today after 9:00 so I hope so! I don't know You never know when people say something here if its the truth or not.
This is how I will get chip back for my phone. So that will resolve this bad situation. Its like I am helpless. No one can call me, I have no way to contact people, and if I had work I wouldn't know?

GOD INTERVENE

Haven't seen Lucas at all, nothing going on in my personal life either, kinda boring now.

Later in the day I worked on the little display, nice pieces but so few. I may have to move some down to Nelsens when he gets back from the USA, I need to sell fast.

I used the deposit money from ICE to buy more so I can make a little money. Really pathetic I mean it I feel so dumb right now.

Well Los Suenos wrote me and I have a meeting with them today at 4:00 To go over details so I think I got the job of decorating the whole hotel for the holidays.

This will be a super good thing, Many many people go there, and have houses and condos I don't know what percentage eat at the hotel but I am sure a few visit from their complex.
That will bring other business and hopefully get me rolling again.

BGEEE ( John) came over for a few minutes last night. Raquel and I and he watched the big plasma, he fell asleep on the leather sofa, MALDICION! SOFA!

That damn sofa makes everyone sleep, I mean everyone! its so comfy people fall out especially me. That is like the one place I sleep great lately.
I have no idea what time he left this morning but he wasn't there when I got up.

It is still Cloudy out no sun today again, I NEED SUN! it was very cool last night I felt cold actually. Not humid at all right now.
I was at Rosies for a few hours eating popcorn and diet cokes, and talking. I met a couple of interesting people. Two guys from Italy very cute and spoke five languages, USA needs to teach more than just Spanish and english and some french, and the Spanish is not manditory. Then I met this young man about 24 from San Diego he was visiting here alone. His parents sent him for a graduation trip.
He was very friendly, we talked for an hour or more.
Carlos a friend dropped by and he chatted with Rosie and I for a while.

Other than that It was quiet.

I sure hope I have Los Suenos! That will be a very nice thing and may change my whole situation here in Costa Rica because of the exposure to my work, and the association with them.

This could be a very needed answer. OHALA....


No birds singing its very quiet today strange. Today the power is going to be shut off most of the day today so I better get ready now its almost 8:00.

They didn't explain why but there was a notification to people in Jaco no power all day.

Don't know how much I will do today then? I have Tony at 9:00 at 11 the chamber for an idea I came up with, and 4:00 Los Suenos.
I want today to go well! NO MORE BULLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Holiday decor again

I went very early yesterday to fix the tires, only 2 mill to fix them which amounts to about 4 dollars. That was tolerable, I had coffee there which was so good, later I picked up my laundry that was $2.00 1 mill, and went to try to find the phone and of course no one has seen it. It was stolen. Tom offered me his extra and today I will go and talk to the ICE to see if I can get another chip. This is not as easy as it sounds. But Ohala, it might work?

I then went to the office alone, read mails chatted online with my son and his girlfriend and a fee others. Got I believe my ticket to go to the states straightened out, Well they said this yesterday, but here everyday is an issue with something!
Then I went and installed Rosies Holiday decorations. I felt like here I am again back to the labor that I ran away from. And now i am doing it again in order to eat.
Its not a bad thing its just a little hard. Hard on the hands and body. I invent things very easily but the installation is the part that I dislike.

She loved it and wants more.So today I make more. And Try to finish my little display that I am working on. Honestly.... I think its pathetic! I have so few things, and the space is huge.

I have no money to make it right, But hey It is allot better than doing nothing. At least my mind is busy thinking of pretty things to make.
They love it in the office not knowing what I can really do or have seen any of the hotels or places, commercial that I have done Malls, all sorts of things in my life...so this is like making a home bizarre to me rather than a nice show room of products.
You have to understand where I have been and what I was capable of, so now I feel this is silly... but happy that he offered and I am very grateful that he is allowing me to do something.

I don't know if this will work, I hope so but At least Iam trying.

I stayed until eight last night working on things, so I was pretty tired when I got home.
Raquel spent the day with Lucas, cleaning and doing whatever. She made him food and took care of him I suppose. He is not feeling well.


I haven't seen him much. In the evening she returned with me. I don't know what to do about this one. I keep telling her to give me the rent or find a place then she turns on the charm and pretends to help a little... I'll give her a few more days. I can't carry another person.

Then Cristhian messaged me last night needing help... how can I help anyone right now? I need help more than ever!!! I have everything due and nothing going on.

I am independent and do not like to depend on others, I racked my brain this morning trying to think of something I could do that would bring income. I read every article in the MSN page today about the 10 ten home making ideas that is bringing in lots of money for others.. one guy is fish guide... I did a party some years ago for fish guide. This guy had bucks. We did all the centerpieces with Carved wooden fish and mirrors and a scene that i created with Fresh flowers and lots of details. HE was thrilled... but that is an easy art. Plus its his passion he does what he loves.

I love my decor but I don't have the same reaction when it is time for people to pay.. I want to try to come up with something new... I am a great cook excellent so Rosie' and others say, I am professional event designer, landscape designer, Home designer,and Holiday Queen , Not my words but what was said about me in a magazine.... yet here I am having the struggle of my life!

I thought about advertising in our local cable its cheap but I haaaaaaaa don't even have the money for that! I was thinking of putting holiday decor for your vacation home! we put it up and take it down... and catering for your friends and family when you visit.

I don't know what else to come up with? I am still racking the brain here... but I can do anything i have proven that. The problem is i have an incorporation, in order to work here you have to pay for that or you can not work in this country. Working for someone yes but under the table and I can not see me doing that. Not every one has an incorporation, its only for qualified businesses, at the time I started here I was qualified. NOW LOL I couldn't qualify for the bread line.

"Oh well" things will get better OHALA...

hope you like these photos?

I didn't write yesterday because it took so long to put up those photos but I hope you liked the perspective. Its hard to take great shots with the vibration of the plane, and being that its just a normal camera. But I did manage to get a couple of nice ones. This plane was built for Experimental flying and observation in Africa, I wrote a whole story about it in the Jaco guide this month. It has dual engines and cruses very slow at 500 feet or less. It is very quiet too in comparisons to other planes. Not to disturb wildlife and is meant for ground observation. Its really a blast to ride in so if you live here in Costa Rica please come and try it! if you come to visit Contact me and I will set you up with a flight.
The best part to me was the take off, in less than five seconds we were off the ground with incredible force and up in the air floating rapidly above 800 feet. Soon to a thousand. The air was cooler of course, its humid and hot here so that was nice to feel the fresh cool air.

We went for about 45 minutes, I didn't have to pay because I gave them free publicity this month and I wanted to be sure I knew what I wrote about in reality.

I Did get the car fixed however this morning I could not sleep. I got up at 4:00 turned on the air conditioning then laid back down and worried. I got up shortly there after about 5:00 as soon as it was daylight. I went out to the car I was worrying about it and looked at the tires, well I saw two nails in the front and now I somehow have to pay to have these replaced, How I don't know Money is so tight. But I did get the other part fixed. Lucas did pay for it and I agreed to pay him back. I noticed he gives money to lots of people... He gave some Colombian girl a few thousand.. so I guess I am not special.
He hasn't seen me much since I been down. To busy with his Colombians... I wrote him a note explained how horrible I feel about myself but he didn't comment. Anywayyyyyyyyyyy

I did receive papers from my attorney here for my incorporation, you have to be Incorporated in order to work here as an American.
I needed those for ICe to Return my deposit on the power bill for the office. I got it back yesterday. So two things resolved, then I went all over getting a few items because Tom in the Century 21 offered me the whole front of the office to display my Christmas designs.

Nice but I don't have very much no money to produce them but Wow that was very nice, I didn't ask he just came to me and said wow all the pretty things you making and there stuck here in the back where no one sees them, I will let you have the front for now an put them out there and hopefully you will sell some. So we started renovating that area and today will begin to display some items.

Well while I was doing this yesterday my cell phone was on the bar that was in my office and is now the reception counter in Century. The reason it was on the bar is there is no signal inside this building except there.. everyone puts there phones there. I don't have an office phone yet and no cards so this is my only phone for communication and work... WELL SOMEONE STOLE IT.
Now in the states this is not an issue you cancel get a new phone and reconnect the line.. but as an American here almost impossible.
The reason is Tony an ex employee got me the line he is Tico you have to have a Tico to get you a line... there are no more lines here available till Dec MAYBE??? but he has to disconnect it then come sign papers reconnect it.. HASSLE and he doesn't exactly live here nor does he talk to me... So Today I am going to try to get another chip, and borrow another phone I need it I pray god intervenes on this one

So Many trials lately I am so tired and worried I can't sleep and I been eating more junk because no money to buy good things , cheap is the word.

I finally heard from Brandon my son, I wrote a note saying both my sons can't write five words to ask how I am or say anything. He wrote eight and told me to be happy! I laughed but I want more than EIGHT DANG WORDS!!!

I sure hope this ticket deal gets straightened out other wise I lose over a thousand dollars on this airline thing and I wont be able to see the kids or have the passport stamped. With no other options I don't know what I am going to do.

I already did some cleaning here this morning, Raquel is still sleeping, still not working although she helped me yesterday a little.. She does not like to work. She wants to return to Spain.. I hope that happens soon for mine and her sake.

Right now there are lots of birds singing, hummingbirds are coming to the patio drinking from the Heliconias out around. I heard macaws yesterday above the apartment and hanging in the trees out back.
There is not much sun lately cloudy and cooler, Rained like hell last night. I was suppose to install Rosie's holiday decor I created but it rained too hard for me to put it up.
Everything is outdoors here so I need to wait,maybe today during the day I can and surprise her when she shows up.
WHAT TO DO ABOUT MY PHONE??

Saturdays open cockpit air ride

This is a beach shot in playa Hermosa

This is a rice pattie, flying over Esterillios Pastures with cows in a circle

Cows in a circle

back of Jaco
Over view of Jaco
two pretty houses in Hermosa

this is the main road for the coast line called the Coasta Nera

Down town jaco

These are some of the photos i took in the air in the three man open cockpit airplane, made for National Geographic, it was a blast!

With out a car

Well I did exactly that yesterday I got ready to leave and Raquel got right up and got ready to go with me. I told her I was not paying for breakfast, she walked along with me to the soda. I was feeling pretty low, although I tried not to show it. I dressed really nice yesterday trying to make my spirit feel better by appearing to be totally together and fine, but inside I was sad, and worrying about the car, and how I would get through this. Even So Lucas had said the night before he would help me and not to worry??? I felt strange about this. Using someone to pay for my problems is not like me. IF he should it would be great, and it would be a huge relief for me since its been one thing after another ya know?

So we ate I had one egg, two slices of tomato and orange juice. Raquel, pinto sour cream, meat and veggies. WE Walked to the town, at the corner she told me she was going to get her hair done... I stopped for a minute and looked at her strange, then said ok by. Inside a little angry that she had money to do this but still owed me the rent... not knowing where she got the money for the hair.She cleaned Lucas house last week I told him how much she owed me and he gave her that much. But she has not given me any of that yet.

Thinking the whole way walking to the office which was quite a ways away. I felt used, angry a little and worried more.
When I got to the office I emailed called a person or two, then tried to create some holiday decor, but I ran out of glue and no greens to cover the Styrofoam. discouraged because I was without a car not able to run to get what I needed, I sat out on the curb and watched Lucas ride by on his bike. I think he saw me but he kept on going and didn't say hello.

I thought about this situation with him. In the three weeks I have known him he is always pleasant, but... The reason is that he has so many different women there when I visit. Mostly Colombian girls which he adores all the Columbianas allot. They do all sorts of things for him I am sure for money. Or because they have those intentions of getting money out of him. He is certainly nice but I have heard from his mouth some things that were not exactly respectful or considerate to me, should he feel the way he says he feels about me. Like for example asking if he could do other things with Raquel after she cleaned his house??? No really he asked me this.. I was cool I responded" I don't care what you do its your business" but inside I was upset thinking anyone that respected me would not dare to ask me this! maybe I am old fashion in that respect, but that is only one incident I care to share on the net about him. When I arrived at his place last night some young Colombian girl was putting up all sorts of goddy Christmas crap! I was really mad because he knows I do what I do, and didn't have me do it... but paid this young prostitute to do it for him and wanted me to sit and enjoy here putting things up! come on now! that is ridiculous.. Oh yeah and Raquel was there when I arrived too, drinking , smoking and buttering the guy up for whatever reason, This kinda ticked me too! so I was angry and left

He is a great old guy really, I realize he can do whatever he chooses hes not connected with me even though he has been telling everyone I am his next wife. HE is 70 and I am sure he this is his way of life. Many women ,people wanting money, and well him drinking it up and partying till he shuts down, as he says. He is polite at times times and is generous, but I feel strange about having him do things for me.. its not correct. And I do not like the fact that there is all these young girls around doing whatever for him!

So I think the best thing is to just stay away from him. I do what I do.


Raquel followed me out the road when I left ten minutes later only after buttering up the old fart, and convincing him of how sweet she is.
Upon coming to the road she was not friendly, It was dark I was trying to call a taxi but none available. When I saw two coming down the road and yelled out Taxi, she got mad at me... of course she was a little high from drinking and doing whatver with Lucas earlier...and then she said in spanish why are you yelling for a taxi are you crazy and called me a couple of names... I looked at her in shocked and now anger and said you can leave now. Go away from me.. she said you too! and walked off. So when I got into the taxi you know now I was really pist.

I rode to the shop that is open 24 hours a day its very dark, and I am brooding now... then the shop says its $100 bucks for a hose and change of oil.
I didn't have it, I argued with the guy saying you charged me more because I am a gringa, 44 dollars for a hose? and 38 bucks to change the oil?
Ok now I am embarrassed and upset... I call a taxi and leave for the house.
About a half hour later Raquel walks in I am eating last nights chicken. only meat nothing more...

We don't talk she goes out side and I see she is smoking so I go out with a glass of water to sit.
I tell her her hair is pretty and she goes on on about Luca's giving her something and more...

She left went out for the night, I stayed home and thought. Ate popcorn and watched the tv tell I fell alseep on the couch.


Today I was suppose to go in the plane with John, But the weather is not great, then later today a very handsome single attorney is coming to Jaco. I did some things in his little office, he called yesterday and said it was lovely... wants to meet with me so I look forward to seeing and getting paid.
I want him to buy my sofa that would be the answer to all my problems right now...

Faces, car issues... ticket issues... ice issues

Raquel painted this on herself

Rosie

don't know her name?

scary Mari zebra

This is Lucas bald head

Halloween was a small success, I painted a number of faces, didn't get photos of all of them because I was the only one painting... Raquel was going to help but ended up flaking out, only did one the whole night because I told her get BUSY! people were waiting in line. I made only 95 dollars but it was fun and I met allot of people.. who maybe will remember me for one thing or the other. I was two different things that day first a zebra, then a lion. I have photos of the lion in a friends camera, Tomorrow I will try to locate him and put it on the web.

Things are bad, I been fighting with ICE to Return a deposit of 300 dollars I made for the old office, they wanted documentation that I was the owner, I gave them what I had only after five trips there.. everyday it was a different story, so every day I took something they needed... I asked every day what more. THEY SAY NOTHING THEN WHEN I RETURN TO GET THE MONEY ITS SOMETHING ELSE... so stinking frustrating!!!!! Right now its about the papers for the license its expired in Oct and Juan Carlos my attorney will not return calls or mails or messages? WHY I HAVE NO IDEA just pile that on to the rest of the crap I am dealing with...
Now Continental will not issue a change in my ticket to return to the states for Thanksgiving because it was in Cristhian name, I bought it , paid for change 200 bucks but now its papers they want from hi,m.. he is in San Jose has no money to get back here and the papers are probably here... he is being elusive about things too....
The car last night started to make a strange noise when I went to get Lucas, for dinner... I wanted to thank him some how for giving me some money the other day to do the toes and nails so I went and bought some food for dinner and made orange chicken, mashed potato's, salad, Italian bread and wine... When I left the car acted up? it was the power steering again... Now I am flabbier gas ted ok, No money to repair this car again and with out that I am dead... no work and no way to get around again..
I made it to his house he was having a cocktail with some man and didn't think I was coming.
I said hellos and said dinner is ready but inside I was pist and frustrated because of what happened with the ticket, the ice and now the car!
It was obvious I was not happy... He came and I told him in the car about the car and he heard it... So I went right away to this car wash/ auto shop.. that is open 24 hours. I pulled in and they looked and it was a hose... but who knows if it damaged the pump? I HOPE NOT, he told me have them fix it and change every thing oil, transmission, breaks s total.. BUT WHO'S PAYING for that.. I asked him he said Just do it...
So we took a taxi back to my house where Raquel was in here PJ's and waiting laying on the couch.

I rushed got things together and served dinner. IT was a nice dinner he enjoyed and I ate way too much.
We sat outside and talked a little and then he rested on the couch laying down to sleep for a couple of hours. He had to take a taxi home.. don't think he liked that.


So I went to bed shortly after that. I woke up depressed, worrying about everything... especially the ticket issue that is a thousand dollars of a loss, the three hundred is possibly a loss too, not to include the closing of the other place and losing all that..

I need positive energy to get back on track here... Something has to break again!

Yesterday I didn't do a whole lot, I ate in the morning, then went to my place.. but David a friend from the states needed a ride to Herradura, I took him after mails at the office. Pick up my things at Rosie's and returned them to the office. David made suggestions of sex to me.. as a form of payment for the ride. DID NOT impress me in fact I was upset because this is the last thing I have on my mind right now... HOW ABOUT five bucks for the ride I should have said! a taxi would have charged ten.

Then I had a coffee at Rosie's the town is dead, nothing going on no people... I ate some banana nut bread toasted with butter and relaxed and thought about Thanksgiving with my kids, and how that bread reminded me of the times I made it for them and my mother... funny how things trigger memories sometimes?
I enjoyed thoroughly.... and reminisced in my mind... praying that all things work out here, and that I get back on my feet soon.

Then went to the mas permanos and bought things for dinner...

I am walking about two miles today to the office, no taxi money and well I ate so much last night it will be good for me to get the exercise. Its nice out today sunny and pretty so the sun should make me feel better I hope?

Now for the weekend... what is in store? hope to hear from the kids...

painting faces

We set up today and had a few takers for Tomorrow, even one that wants the whole body done.
We have a few appointments so thats nice! I was a gorry I dont know what earlier, I had spiders on my face that I painted, and red exaggerated lips something like the joker, a bullet wonded in my chest with blood, and dark circles under my eyes and up the jaw bone.I didn't take a photo but tomorrow i will have Raquel take photos. I painted a mask tonight with sparkles and I have sheer scarfs on, with big earings.

We are having fun with this people love it they stop and stare and talk, and look at our sign. So tomorrow should be very interesting.

Look for photos tomorrow!

Sunday, NO BEACH

Well the sun was out only for two hours by the time I got done on the net and got dress it rained.
All day was cloudy, I worked on the sign for the painting of faces, Then I went to post it at Rosie's then went to maxi bodega with Lucas, and Raquel... I was stressed with them. Raquel has no money and so snuggles up to Lucas to get him to buy things for her.. I left wandered around the store alone and let them talk. I needed to hury because of my class at two but they were taking there time So felt stressed out about it.

I went to Belly dancing alone she wanted to come but I needed a break from her. She is very negative and depressed and rightly so. So I left here alone here in the house and I went and took time for myself and it was nice. We danced two hours I was so exhausted and my back hurt like crazy. Its difficult dance but I am doing well, in fact she said I had the best shimmy and the best figure 8, that is where you move the body only in the center in an eight, making it look like the body is with out bones. Its hard but I learned and did it perfect! I got to work on my hip shakes down and up that is really hard to do... but this week I plan on practicing with Rosie.
Later Rosie and I went to Jaco Taco and ate great Tacos, Real Mexican style which is not common here. THey do not make this type or the flavor Of Mexican food, the food here is pretty bland and simple.
We had one margarita, I shouldn't have I took my last pill but I feel ok today, it was great sure did help the pain!
Lucas rode by on his bike with Frans, and we yelled they came in drank water and chatted with us.
Lucas of course wanted me to come over so I went to Rosies for a minute, then walked to his house. visited with him till 12 in the night... HE IS CRAZY for an ol cogger hes nuts! but fun and very sweet.. HE ASKED ME AGAIN TO MARRY HIM said he has never asked a women this in 40 years. I said hold on take it easy lets go slow. He wants me to go to California with him in Decemeber, I am going to go I would love to meet his family and see where he lives and do some shopping in LOS ANGELES. He was very serious about the proposal wants me to get my divorce papers and have them nulified by the catholic church and he wants a big wedding with everyone??? He says he looked for someone like me for 40 years, and he knows I am the lady! ok but I don't know that right now. Its too dang soon for me.. I want to know him more who knows what might happen. He is a super guy but I see he drinks much never gets out of control but likes his cocktails... We talked about a million things, very interesting man, has traveled the world and has been in many different adventures.

But as I said before, I don't know how much I do believe or weather or not he is real. I generally know a person right off the bat but here in Costa Rica people are different, especially the ones that live here from the USA. Not sayting there bad Enough experiences now is telling me to be very carefull.

Today I am going to Los Suenos again they wrote yesterday with there budget. I Want this job or any job right now!!
Amapola wrote this morning saying they don't have money after they shook my hand and said its a deal? I am going there too. I wish people were honest ya know?
Then later I am getting the nails and toes done, Lucas gave me some money to make my self pretty. I didn't ask he looked at the nails and then saw the toes and said here go get these fixed! so I was HAPPY! I said thank you a number of times, very sweet thoughtfull man.

I hope today goes well, Its not sunny today it is going to rain, It rained horrible last night. I hope today the sun comes out! I want to go the beach.