This is queen of the night, these fragrant flowers that are profusely blooming fill the entire area with purfume in the evenings.Rena de noche, the red rose is stunning next to this.

Cahtys and our new BBQ
The crowd at the zoo project

Look at the hooves
all the types of Chorizos
Another area for hamon
Catus on the roadway where I walk to Talmanca
One of the typical Spanish style Architecture in Ibiza

Hamon, Typical it is salted and dried almost a year, then served plain with bread, cheeses, olives. It texture is slighty chewy sliced very thin, with bands of fat. The color is dark to me it almost is a raw taste, but good. The flavor is very rich.
David My friend , that I clean his house and now am personal chef three times a week for.
Ibiza from the Castle
Ivan, the niece of Jamie took this photo, Ivan is walking up the castle walls

Great weather, little changes, people visiting, the town is getting busy.

As the tourist seasons builds, the whole town becomes alive. Locations that were dead of life, and ghostly looking are now painted, lit up signs hung, and now have become alive with action. Discotechs popping open everywhere. Restuarants that were only shells are now filled with people laughing drinking and talking the nights away. The sun is blistering hot, with humidity so they say??? for me its dry and arid. Living in a tropical Climate, this is no comparisons to humidity.

My dancing efforts have not come throught this past two weeks, first the Event on Monday for the Austrailians, was not the type of event for this. It was wild rage party, people half naked, and using drugs. So I rode all the way there on the bus more than a hour, transferred twice walked about a mile or more to the location to find this. I turned around walked back and headed for the bus.

Cathys birthday was that night so I ended up Cooking for all the people on the new BBQ that Jaime bought. It took a while we had a mountain of meats. Then three days ago I tried again at Talamanca, but little did I know that the championships soccers were this week so most of the people including tourists were in locations that have big screens to watch the games. So I changed my clothes gathered my things and walked back to Jesus around 9 at night. Jesus is not close to Talmanca walking in a car its only ten minutes or so. But walking is a bit far. As I got up the hill a taxi was sitting at the intersection,I turned the corner and began walking, the taxi mobed slowly besides me, then finally the man yelled out is it far where you need to go? I said well not to far only Jesus near the Cip. HE said get in I will take you... I did and he was very nice, said he has seen me before walking and offered to give me rides should he see me again.

That was nice, I was a little tired actually! not to mention disapointed that I didn't get to dance.

I have a small amount of work now, its not much but its a start, I have been spending time handing out cards to offices, real estates, restaurants, and yatch companies. Also Spoke to Pacha, and one hotel. The Zoo project people have never called, although I have sent messages, and emailed. It would be nice for a huge opportunity to open for me, and land something that is worthy of my talents, and gifts. I am very blessed when it comes to being able to accomplish what I choose to.

I really would like something that is not 9 to five, something where I am doing work in the house on the computer, or at least a part of it.

I have an interest from a Natural product company called Carpe Diem in Costa Rica. This would be good too, If so it could cover Spain, Costa Rica and USA. Giving me time to visit the kids, and travel.

I like this one! I am trying to be calm, not worry but its not easy. I just want to work!!

I have spent alot of time with Cathy now, were becoming really good friends. She doesn't like to go any where with out me now. I think its very sweet, and kind of her.

Seasonal fruits are coming now, Cherry's paraguay's these are squaty looking small peaches, very tasty the meat is white. Lots of peaches, watermelons and various sorts of melons I am not familiar with. We now have tomatos in our garden, lots of squash, and I planted all the herbs. Green beans are overflowing now.

I hope this weekend is filled with fun! people are visiting Cathy from the mainland, they all came with there cars on the huge ferry, late at night around 1:00 am, the ferry unloaded miles of Trucks and cars and people who came across from Spain or England and other countries.

Like I said the town is getting full.

Not to much exciting going on

Esto es, Miradorres this is a look out tower, for pirates. they are all over the Island

Yactes en de marina

Juliano en Nov

Centro Puerto Ibiza

Centro puerto Ibiza

I been working on my business cards so that people know all I am capable of, On the front it has a dancer, its black with orange. It looks super nice, on the back a list of all the possiblities of types of work I can do. I have people say its a great card, now hopefully soon someone will hire me to do something!! I have been Cleaning that one house, its not my idea but its a little cash.

Other than that I walked a bit last week, in town searching for new places, and jobs, and materials that I needed. I helped Cathy a couple of times in the garden. I found out her name is really Catalina, she is a wonderful person. Adoring, kind, I never see her uphappy, and she is so giving. She makes me eat with them constantly, she worries I won't eat if she doesnt invite me. Its nice really I am happy that they like me. The Grandmother is funny, a real character, Ivan is in love with me the baby... he can not stay out of my apartment. He climbs in my bed too.. its so cute.

I bought him a little tooth brush, because he loves to get one of mine and try to brush his teeth, So now he has one in the drawer here to use. He loves to open the drawers and eat what I have in the kitchen too. I let him do whatever he wants. He is adorable. Really makes me miss Julian

I met with the zoo project, On Sat, it was there Inaugaration party for the events for the Summer. The producer called to come and see it, talk with him a moment and then we would discuss a job. I went it was expensive to get in, the door fee was 80 euros, I didn't have to pay of course I was invited only to view.

It was in a super cool place the old zoo, renovated with Swimming pools and now areas for dancing and bands, chill out areas, and huge mile long bbq. I just so happen to meet the owner of the Zoo, Funny all those people and I run into the owner, actually talk with him for a while he invited me for a drink. We walked the property and discussed what they do, and how it was formed, then he talked with me about what I do. He was interested in the Belly dancing of course.

So he said come on Monday I have a group from Austria and you can dance. I will present you to them, but it is not paid by me, maybe they will want to only do tips but I will talk with them.

I was happy that is a start, the location is really great.

Today, my rent is due, I have most of it, but my money is dwindling fast. I am concerned, but I seem to be peacefull here. I am gratefull for Cathy, and my quiet life so far. Also I need to find some music for this afternoon. Today is Also Cathys birthday, where having a small celebration later.I bought her a pair of capris, brown, and some bracelettes and earings. She really like these capris I have, so I found some just like them and hope she likes i

I wish I could do more....

I have practiced alot lately, getting better.

Last Night we all went around 10:00 to the Church on the corner, outside is a huge plaza, they had a fiesta with live music, food beer, a bouncing house for the kids, Balloons,and play ground. It was small but fun. I danced alot of course! All the children danced with me. Lots of them.. it was so fun and made my spirit feel alive! We ate some meat that was bbqed on kabobs, and some pork, with natural bread from here. Then these little doughnuts that were like my mother made from Sicily. Called Spingees, It is a potato based dough with flour, lemon, and sugar, and anise. My mind recalled memories of the past as I savored the sweet and anise flavor of these delicate little dough nuts. I am finding that many things here have the same influence as my Family cultural food and traditions.

I think that Italy had some influenence on This Island because there are many things similar, or it could be that Spain and Italy share very similar traditions.

Family?

Can it ever be?

Here are photos of Agua blanca A place I went with a friend. It was not so pleasant with him, He drinks so much also. I find that I have no company with drunks. Nothing much to say by me during the day. I was shocked honestly by the amount he comsumed, so I separated myself, by quiet, silience, and just drank in the sea. I wanted to go and lay out but he kept insisting I stay there . So I sat in the sun, listened to music, drank a beer, water, ordered food! and enjoyed the best I could.

It is a nice day, Sun is shinning now, hopefully for a while.

Euporbia in our Garden Click on the photos to inlarge

Ivan

DJ Simon

Talmanca Chill out area

Alegria, de rancho bar

Talamanca la Playa

This is Talamanca ... Alegria, the bar

The side Garden in front of my apartment

The past few days no internet, the storm or something completey screwed it up all over the Island. I still do not have internet at the house, not only that but the computer decided to go to sleep for two days. Its awake again, there is definately something wrong with it. This is not normal, its been looked at several times and yet it does this

I have been searching for work.The french gals offer didn't come through at her bar. Just as well.

I have not heard from the other, although I have messaged and called his answering service.

Weather is much better really hot today, Kathy and I went to there local I would call it a flea market. It was so hot out there, but fun. I was amazed at all the hippe clothes. Not my style but some of it was pretty. I saw Maike there I didn't know she sold at this market. I was surpised, she said hello we chatted briefly.Other than that not much going on. Danced at Talamanca on Thursday made some ok Tips. Actually had a couple of people come that heard I was going to perform.

This was nice, I have photos of Simon and the beach now, the camera is fixed so I will be putting some photos of me in costume soon. The garden where I live the Island and more.

Tomorrow I am going to Aqua blanca a private area beach very nice restuarant with one of my amgios.

So photos of this should be very pretty.

Toliet Paper Man I AM LAUGHING!!

More things to know about Ibiza and Spain:
The woman like strange clothing combinations
The latin people are loving,not exceptionally warm but when they like you and someone says something bad about you, you better get ready to fight, OLAAAAAAAY
Flamico Dancers, dance until they die, AGE has no bearings on dance
Wine, olives, Shandees are a way of life, not a day goes by they don't drink this with there food.
Lunch is not at noon
Tomato is a predominant condiment, in every form, mostly fresh mashed and seeded, spread on bread before anything else.
Olive oil is a main stay
The lavender plant, rosemary, grows naturally in the moutains
The true Spanards are very fair skinned, dark haired and blondes.
Bacala which I thought was only Italian is one of the main fish they love

I have had some really good wines here, and there not expensive, before Spain some years back I discovered, Tempranillos, I really enjoyed the fullness of this wine. But its nothing like the Real Spanish Tempranillos that have been here for ages. Its the basic table wine here, its really fruity and full, and wow packed with power.

I had a great day regardless of the mess I woke up to on the internet this morning with the barrage of comments that were mostly invalid. I want to address Toliety man.. WOMAN! probably! I am going to expose you.
For the information of others, this man who was kind enough to buy me a few things when I really was in need, had no idea I was American!!! I spoke mostly in Spanish to him, he didn't know I had email, he didn't know I had blog.. so the person who took on this personality is not the real man who was kind to me.
All that other nonsense! Nothing to say..
I am not going to permit any of it to keep me from living, doing what I do. Enjoying what peace I have, with no bills, no debts, no credit card threats or worries, simple living.
Looking still for work and I know its coming I have options.

Today was a horrible weather day, it rained almost all day, buckets of rain, thunder, lightning. Not permitting me to get out and do what I was suppose to do. I was suppoe to clean another house today different person.But the connection person works the beach, she rents chairs and umbrellas to tons of tourists, she was not there because of the rain. So I waited till it was about gone, went to the bus waited for the bus. Someone I know saw me and offered a ride into town. That was so nice! I went into the printer, at the end of Iviza, where I have had some cards made. Stating all the things I am capable of doing, with a belly dancer on the front and on the back more information, about Catering, personal chef, Landscape, Interior, events, design. parties, weddings and free lance writing.

Then I walked to the Camera Shop and had my camera looked at, got it all fixed. I walked to a cute little pastry coffee shop, there everywhere here its the thing to do in the afternoon. I stopped in it was an Italian place I had a cortado, its a shot small typical coffee, with a tiny little horn pastry that was filled with chocolate! so good.
After I walked about looking at Fabrics, and just things. I walked to the middle of town and through the port looking at people. I made a special effort to talk to the french guy I met at the shop in the port last Sat. He was bored, no people because of the rain. After I walked to Mcdonalds got a diet soda, and waited for the bus.

I rode into Jesus, hoping that my friend was going to call and take me to San Antonio to talk to those producers about this job I was told about.
So he did, I went to San franciso on the corner, waited had a glass of wine untill he showed up.
I met two of his friends from France, Beautiful women, and we all chatted in English, then they changed to French. I didn't understand a word.
Later the one girl asked If I was working I said no, she said they needed people at the club she worked at, said she would talk to her boss tonight. I said Sure that would be great.
My friend then took me to the place where I was to meet this producer, they do a party tour on weekends. They are looking for people to work, I waited for him to show up, when he did I already knew who he was. I met him some weeks ago when I went to the Elephants. We talked a bit he is from London. He recognized me, he said oh its you? I have all your information but didn't connect it was you. Great he said
We discussed a postion, and I am gong back to talk again before Sat. He needs someone with my experience in organization.

KEEPING MY FINGERS crossed.
My expectations are that I will get a good job, untill then I am doing what I can to make it.
We drove home after it was late around 11:45 for here its not late, people stay up super late. I got on line and chatted with family and friends.. now to bed.

YATCH WASHER

ONCE again another false promise, that didn't ever happen period.
I think my friend was trying to give me hope or WHO KNOWS? but when I finally walked to his house and personally asked him what is up with this job offer, He hummed and hawed, We went back and forth a little I said hey you told me to wait, I have? and now I am curious although this is not something I ever dreamed of doing, its better than sitting and doing nothing. And at least its money coming in, who knows where it could lead.
In the final results he said the people never called him back and that it was a good thought. He said that I should go myself to the Marina and ask.

A little peaved at him I stood there not saying much, didn't talk frankly at all! staring at the floor thinking ok, another strange situation, but hey at least it was out on the table now.

IT WAS A THOUGHT !
I got my jacket and began to say ok I will talk to you later, when he stopped me and offered that I clean his house. I thought well, ok sure. So Today I went and cleaned, He asked for twice a week.

My Brother when I was about 19, had a cleaning business.I would help him many times, offices, business and a few houses. So I know how to do it and I am a very clean, organized person, but its been years ago in that type of work. It was late nights of cleaning when the businesses closed. I thought about that while I cleaned his house. But I never dreamed I would be doing this, I am not to proud to work. There was a time when my sister would pay me to clean her house once a week so its not beyond me to do this, although I have always wanted my own house keeper!!

There are options, I have written many people.. Weather some of you know it or not, I will succeed. I wanted to see a different place, I did it, that doesn't mean I am here for ever it may?or it may not it all depends on what happens here. I still want to see more of the world and I can say once again I do miss Costa Rica. Should I wait and depend on someone to pay for my travels? or pray someone will just take me where I want to go?

NO I make the decisions, with little or no money I find a way, perhaps its not easy, at times it is super peaceful, a drastic change from my prior life. Sometimes I find just thinking about the weather, dull as that might seem to some a great way to pass the afternoon. I am learning daily, not only about me but about people. Cruel most of them, dishonest, but in that sorted mess I generally find something good about the person.

A life of stress, hectic work, panic, constant worry about bills, and how to make ends meet,being alone. Now its much simplier, Still alone most of the time, I have learned much about culture, people, and myself. I am strong, I do survive even when there are moments I feel I can not go on a second longer.. Somehow something snaps in me and I become alive again and take it in different direction.
I have done allot in the four years I have been away from the USA, not only have I seen some incredible things, and visited some unusual places, but I have tried things I never dared to before. I have Met some interesting characters, I have made some really good friends, I have ate things I didn't know what it was utill after, I have learned to love Pinto Gallo! I have changed my mind, My body and my spirit.
YOU! can do anything if you set your mind to it. There are times when I think, honestly I want something much better, and I know if I really concentrate I can have whatever I want! but its nice to be simple, and not worry so much. It is nice to sleep till 9:00 in the morning. Something I never use to do.
I wanted to leave the USA, Many reasons, one the area the rain, the people,my life My children, the fighting that was going on between them and the lack of love,it was not what I felt was good for me any more. I read ,took a year and just studied about places in the world.
I felt ok I am still young enough to enjoy and see things.
It takes strenght to be able to stop a life that is on going, sell things you own and make a new direction. I have done it.... Not for everyone but for me it was good, and it still maybe.

As far as walking the streets, the way gas is going, the prices! Jesus help us! maybe its best I am walking!!!! MAYBE SOME OF YOU SHOULD TRY IT, it might cut some of that fat off the back side! and give more oxigen to your brain~~~~ making you think clearer, and bit nicer, sending endorfins coarsing through your harden arteries.

At the moment I do not have a car, its the first time in my life since I was sixteen that I have not had a car. Its been approximately 8 months of walking and no car. I just wonder how others peoples approach to being with out would be? Cry about it? Run to the bank and get a loan that ends up costing tripple the amount of the value of the car? or try to tough it out till you can afford a car?

And yes I love to dance, Anonymous, who doesn't have the courage to say who you really are, has no clue that I do dance and dance very well, putting false "you tube" addresses with suggestions that I am a porn dancer? or making referrances to such stupid jokes whom you believe I have no idea what you are suggesting WRONG!!! Who are you some young moron who has never seen me or even understand Oriental dancing which is technical, and very good for the body and mind. STOP Because of you there will no longer be comments, those that want to comment send it To Myrnana84@hotmail.com
I got tips the very first night because I put money on me and when I danced the people saw, the second night I didn't have cash, Simon didn't make anouncements, They think its a paid act, they didn't know it was for tips. I have had since many people ask me when I was gonig to again because THEY LIKED IT I have had lots of complements. Simon has no idea how to make this work. We are working out the details and I Will dance there and make money!!! I have contacted other venues that will pay cash I will succeed! Honestly, a phrase in spanish is translated in english. You need to have your tongue cut out because you talk falsely with out knowledge of seeing the person you are talking about.

And I can say right now, your smiling, because you got attention from me, But your done. So take your stupidity to another site
Honestly people, If you do not like what I write please move on. I don't do it for you... I do it for myself firstly. I want records of what I think and feel, and I do have family and real friends who do care that read and are interested in How I am doing, feeling and getting along.

At that I will say now: FIRST!! WHERE ARE YOU JON DICKEY? Email me

Facts about Spanards,Ibecincans:

Lots of the women have low gutteral voices, some are very low.
Men are always thinking about the women, the men are generally macho.
They stick to most Traditions
Herbas is the drink of Ibiza about everyone has a chupito now and then.
Hamon is in most Spanards houses or they eat it a few times a week. It is a huge leg of Hamon, cured with salt and it still has the hoof on it sits on a wood platform hoof in hook.
Sausage is always something that is eaten very often, mostly blood,or another type of chorizo.
Many of them Smoke allot.
The Flaminco is in their blood, now the style of Flamico has been moderized but I will say Untill you have experienced it you may not know, it is beautiful, haunting, and really romantic. It is not only the dance it is the song.
BOOTS are a Spanish girls best friend... laughing because I see all types, and its funny some are typical, and not very pretty but they love them!

This will be the last page for comments after this one it is closed.
Those of you who don't understand why READ AGAIN ABOUT THE FALSE YOU TUBES and take a look at some of those.
HATEFUL AND INSULTING... has to be a US citizen or is it?

Really horrible WEATHER!

IT was a terrible weather weekend, Rain, Clouds, not able to dance.. many people but alll were inclosed in hotels and bars. Although Kathy and I went Sat night to a local place in San Jordi, they served us a platter or a mountain of food. Typical of Ibiza, half buns or crusty breads, with fried omlette type eggs, some with a hamburger patty, some with bacon, ham and cheese melted on top. Half faced all of it and piled up high. I took little nibbles of all three, we visited with her sister in law, and mother in law and the two grandsons.

Later Kathy and I took a trip to Down town Ibiza, it was about 10:30 at night. We walked along the harbor in the front of the city looking at all the enormous yatchs. I swear to my life I have never seen such huge yatchs ever.. My god! HUGE!! beautiful, all different colors. With lights all below the water surface, glowing like huge Icons in the port. Symbols of wealth for the world to see.
It was pretty amazing, spectacular to see up close.
Some are much larger than the normal home.

We walked along the waterfront, visited shops that are open till one am, and little vendors along the road ways and alleys. It was so much fun.
Loads of people drinking eating so late at night. I met a french man who has a nice store, he needs help. I Have his email so I am going to see if I can at least get some sort of work.
Today also, I am going to my friends to talk about the yatch cleaning.
Yesterday was a weather disaster for tourists, rain, wind and cold. I went to Talmanca with hopes again but no luck. Only to visit with two girls one from Germany, one from London.Simons friend from London. We chatted and enjoyed each others company, during the rain.

Today I will practice dance, I ate my small breakfast of one egg and toasted french or Italian bread?? coffee. I will then walk to my friends house. Probably eat later with him.
We are going to discuss terms of the yatch job.

I don't want to wash the outsides, I don't know how I can? there huge!!! but inside would be nice and interesting I am sure. And Who knows what it could lead too??? I am trying seriously to remain positive!!!

Raining its suppose to be Summer HERE?

It has been raining allot, its suppose to be Summer here? When? I am not sure I like this weather at all.
Its so similar to Vancouver Washington. Cold at night, I am experiencing allergies really bad, and I am very bored at the moment.
I have contacted almost ten companies/ people for work. Not a thing yet.

No one seems to committ to anything. The gal across the way with the big promises, has said absolutely nothing.
I know I am qualified to do so many things. I have not limited my search to one area, Just about anything actually.
I had an offer from a friend Washing Yatchs of all things! hell I will do it! but he hasn't called for me to come to see what it is I have to do. I have sent him messages on the computer. Because I don't have credit on my phone, So I can't send texts, or call, but I can receive calls.
Its like everyone does the same thing, makes offers then doesn't follow through on the final part? I can't figure it out honestly? The real problem is if I want to wait tables or work in public like that.. not events, parties or in homes or yatchs. I need an Enumber, its a permit to work because your not a resident. This is tough, although my mother is Italian it makes is a little simpler, but I have to have the documents to prove that. I am checking into it.

I been here in the apartment for three days again, The rain keeps me from doing any job search outside other than on the internet. Thank God I have that!
I did a live talk with my friends some days ago, this was the most interesting thing I have done in days.
Yesterday I had planned to Dance, Simon as I said in an earlier blog came by for his laundry a few days ago, we talked about the plan.. But Yesterday it was dark, Cloudy, and not a beach condusive day. So in other words not very many people at the beach. It has to be hot and clear then the people enter the outside bar, and sit in the tents. Which means I have the attention of the people. It is a mix of people, from Germany, France, Italy, England. Some Morrocans, Some Romanians, Some Russians. Now there is more of these people. I was told this is the time they all visit.
Other than this I practiced for two hours yesterday, getting better, it is true everything is better with practice! I know that!
I was so bored I gave myself a pedicure, then suggested to Kathy that I give her one. She has never in her life had one ever! so it was a nice gesture, she really enjoyed it. Talked about it all evening. Ivan and I played allot last night, Jamie, the boyfriend was at work so we sat outside for a hour before it was too cold and Ivan and I played. He's a cute little one, honry BUT CUTE. He loves to hit and slap, and pull hair really hard to where he pulls it out. Kathy tell's him no but he continues. He hits her very hard in the face many times. I tell him no, but he laughs.
I know he got it from Jaime.
One Sunday I ate with them, Jamie demanded Kathy get him a banana, she said something I am not sure What? in Ibecincan, He said something back then she said, oh my neck hurts in Spanish, he said I have something for that, put your head down. She did and he hit her really hard, not exaggerating. on the back of the spine at the base of the neck. After he hit her he said NOW GO AND GET MY BANANA! Frankly I felt embarrassed, and a little upset with his manor. Then I understood why Ivan hits allot, and is so honry. He sees the dad I am sure.
Typical machismo: Women are only good for one thing.
I never said a word, that day but I left very quickly after I finished. Excused myself said my thank yous.. and went to my hole.
Today it feels like it might be better weather the sun is out, but I see clouds in the distance. I am going to go anyway to Talamanca check out the crowd. I heard so many planes last night so I am sure there are more Tourists in Town.
Kathy said in the up coming weeks the streets are full you can not drive, you can not walk.

Hope I have at least one response this week? I need to be working, Its not good for my mind or my spirit to be sitting here doing nothing. Its not good for me physically either. Weekends so far, have only included two adventures, that was with Makela. Now nothing for weeks.
I need to make a plan!

Weds, June 4th

I pittled around here this morning, seemingly taking forever to get ready, why I have no clue. It just didn't come together the way I normally get ready. I walked out and it was cloudy again. Kathy was right outside my window peering in, cleaning up some little something from one of the plants that is outside my bedroom window. Always in the morning Ivan and she or Grandma, Abuela, are outside milling around. We chatted for a second, she commented on how Guapa I looked, and we said good bye. Adios.

I walked right down to the gal who made her promises to me, she was sitting at her desk with people waiting. I smiled as I entered and said good morning, she half heartedly smiled and said right off the bat, you have to wait... I thought ok your the one who called me, On Sunday no less.. and asked me to come on Monday I have done everything she has asked. Now she wants me to wait. I said Oh I understand and I turned and walked out. I sent her my resume, like she wanted, I have done everything she wanted... I did say ok well you know I am right across the street, You need help and I am here if you want me.

I left at that, and walked to the printer that is just down the way. But they only do digital graphics and suggested I go into Ibiza. So I walked to the bus stop, sat down and no sooner than I sat the bus pulled up.

I rode with a hole crew of Tourists, they were all English and German speaking. One little old Ibizan came on and there was not a place to sit. I immediately got up grabbed her arm and said Senora por favor aseintase! I gave up my seat for her, at first she said and where will you go, I said its ok VALE!!! So she sat and I stood.

Got into town, went to the paper, to ask about an add.. and then I found a printer, and talk to them about some cards. I want one that says all the things I am able to do well, and just start handing it out to potiential clients.

Belly Dancing, Sounds crazy! but yes... Catering! Massages! party planner and designer, floral, home, interior, landscape. you name it!! So we worked on the idea and he is willing to let me make little payments. Now I just need to make some tips and pay for the cards.

I walked around found a couple of shops Inever saw before. I spent about four hours walking. I wanted to go that area in the center that I met my friend in where there are many little outdoor restaurants, in the plaza. But I walked through it and it was full.. so I continued on the old part of Ibiza, near the gay district. Its so cool this area. Old architecture, Buildings close together, White washed, laundry hanging from the balconies. Colorfull shutters, a few plants here and there and lots of Bouganvillas. I have a place that I have eaten at a couple of times there in one of the alleys, its very classic spain. But it was full also, and they had mixo paellla, last time I ate it I was sick the next day. It could be the shell fish. So I decided against that. I walked across the alley to one where people wait in line to get into, and I discovered why. Its an old bar- restuarant, TAPAS.. and its probably one of the older ones in the city. Famous for its cheap wine and cheap food.

I got a table right away which is not usual. I have been there before but could never get in. People here do not eat at noon. They close all the shops, and businesses at 1:00 or 1:30 its after this the places fill up. So around 2:00 to 4:00 is when lunch is eaten. Dinner takes place at 8:30 or later, 9:00 or even up to 11:30 at night.

I sat ordered the house wine. Everyone drinks Wine or Shandees, or beer. So I figure wine is better. He brought the dang bottle! Then the bread comes with aoli I love that, garlicy and creamy. I ate a small amount, some bread with olive oil and salt. Its the Italian way and the Ibizan way also.

Then came what Ever it was I ordered??? Sepia, la plancha, ok I know La plancha, like on the grill? but SEPIA? I thought perhaps it was a fish of some sort, I asked for Salad no potatas, they say POTATAS, in Costa Rica is was papas, Salad was plain with a couple of tomatos. Olive oil and vinegar is normal on every table.

I drank the wine watched the people the dogs on leashes! and admired the sights.. I truly enjoyed my lunch, although I didn't have a clue what I was eating, it was chewy, and well I think it was big squid, flattened and grilled with a little garlic, I saw two tenicles, but it also looked like octopus? but that is called pulpo? so I don't know what it was.. but I ate it! then came a guy playing an according, walking around playing so gleefully. He had a hat on and played some classic I am sure tunes. Took off the hat and passed it. I smiled he didn't come my way I watched him in the distance.

I left, walked about, feeling a little drunk after one and half cups of wine. WOW WAS IT EVER STRONG!! not kidding I was tipsy. It was just a local wine, but good red.

I found another restaurant that may use me to dance, talked with them for a few minutes, then it began to rain. Walked about in the old port district for about a hour, then hit a coffee shop the rain was cold to me.

I had a coffee and palm leaf pastry.. I couldn't resist..

Watching as tourists ate loads of ice cream and pastries, and sitting enjoying the afternoon Coffee.

Then I headed for Talmanca,I had a shirt of Simons that I washed and it got left out some how, he talked to me for a while, then showed me his new problems.

Two baby kittens that were left, he asked me if I wanted them I refused, Kittens NO.
Then he asked again if I could do the laundry and I said of course.
Then I got a call from my friend from yesterday, he said he had a job offer for me.
It is of all things Cleaning Yatchs, inside and out.. how the heck will I do this? I don't know but I may give it shot! Ya nevah know?
He is meeting with me tomorrow, Ok here we go again?? I hope?
In the morning I will practice dancing, wait on his call, get my things ready for the evening. I may dance again only this time with announcement so people know what the heck is going on! I explained this to Simon and so were trying to work it out here.. learning as we go.
He seems to really like me, he thinks about me, because he recounts things I say when where together.. So he must be thinking about me.
When he is sober, he such a beautiful person!
See what tomorrow brings, Today was GOOD ALTHOUGH NO WORK CAME it was a great day!

Over the weekend

I spent Sat and Sun helping the land lady clean out the apartment above moving all their things to the one in the bottom. Sunday was a small party for one of the children of the boyfriend of her daughters. I helped her put all the kitchen together, while she cleaned above. I organized everything and cleaned up the apartment below. I worked a little in the Garden, and on Sunday cleaned the terrace area for the party. Cleaned the fountain and put fresh water, floated flowers in it, made arrangements for the tables and the house.
Kathy was amazed at my work, I tried to explain this is nothing! If she saw some of the events and things I have accomplished in my life she would understand. But no use it trying to explain, she can not possibly fathom the products the level of events, the whole kit and caboodle that I have been involved with and have created in my life time.
This was barely a blink for me.. A blink of an eye. Not even a thought went into any of it. But she was amazed! actually gave me some money and bougth me some popcorn and sodas, and a few little items at the store. I accepted since I don't have much in the house! I was happy at her kind gestures.
The party was flat, people were not into talking to much. I tried to communicate with a few, but not many cared to talk to me. I was fine with it, I just watched, listened, and ate like a little piggy. The Cake was the best! it had some rum cream flan combination, white cake, then chocolate mousse or pudding? not sure. With whip cream topping and pastilles, big ones. Silver and lots of decor.
The little pizzas but they called them something else were really tasty too, they like piemientos, red ones with onions, on the pizza nothing more, then one with Some sort of big slice of cheese, oregano, onion and sauce. Some of them spoke in Ibecencan, I am finding it is a mix of lauguages, Lots of Italian in there, and Greek, Spanish. Really wierd it sounds all jumbled to me. I can define one or two words here and there, only because my family spoke some Italian now and then, when I was young, and I know Spanish so its really quite a unique language.

The day was easy, relaxing for me. I had a phone call earlier in the day from someone I had left my name with for work. She has an office right across the street. She asked me to come on monday morning. So Monday morning came, I got all ready bright and early went there but she said I DONT HAVE TIME NOW return in a hour.
An hour went by I returned and she was not around, the gal in the office called her, she said return about 11:30 or 12:00 so I did. When that time came she only had about two minutes for me, not really looking at any of the photos of my work or listen at all simply pushing me off, then saying she knew a client that could use me the owners of Cirque De Soliel. This is the show in Las Vegas, and actually all over the world. OK NOW I AM EXCITED I deserve this, I worked my whole life for an opportunity to be a designer for someone special. I was happy she said return tomorrow and we will go and I will introduce you to them. They have lots of Parties here and they need someone like you!

Ok so Tuesday came, I went early again, she said oh I can not get ahold of him he is at the book keepers won't pick up the phone, and I am really busy so I will call you later. LATER CAME she never called. I was so discouraged yesterday I sat here waiting! But before this On Monday I had an email from another company interested in me... Seems here its the same People interested but no one commits to talking to you or taking time to interview you, I called the company asked when they wanted me to come to talk? they couldn't tell me... Talk about discouraged yesterday! so I just hung out read, got on the internet, because the day before when the gal told me to come back at noon, I did, after that I walked into town but I took a new way which was very long.
I must have walked 12 hours On Monday. I was so exhausted that night. So yesterday, I felt I needed to rest. Now Today I am going to town again see what else I can find to apply for. Talk to someone about making me some cards, drop in on this woman again. And just try to be proactive again.

I don't want to give up! its been two months and nothing has popped! I have so many talents, I can do just about anything I put my mind too, I mean and good!! I am one of those kinds of people. I endeavor to do well and I generally do excellent. SO NOW WHY ISN'T someone Wanting me? I refuse to give up! every day I write more than five companies or people. but no responds, or if they do they don't committ to anything?? so strange?
Well the good thing is the weather is nice, still a bit cloudy but better than it was. Another good thing is I talked with my friends that live in Costa Rica, on the Web Cam. It was fun to see everyone, they miss me and I miss them. They want me to come back... MAYBE I WILL! I miss the warm weather, the dance, the food, the beach, the people. But I don't miss the robbing, the drugs, the theivery. So how to combat that? then I would be ok. But I need work there and right now? NOTHING EITHER! so where is th balance here? or there?

Great full for my days, although my nights are lonely. I pretty much stay alone here. Almost all the time. I have met some people but no one really calls or visits. Only yesterday was the first time a friend called and came and took me for a ride. He told me about the opening of Space a huge Club here. That he had gone with a few people this past weekend, but when he was telling me I felt neglected, he bragged about the place and how much fun they had. But I thought well why didn't he invite me? I have never been to any of them yet. HE KNOWS THIS and I repeated as he told the story, I would have like to seen that? But hey its better!!! To many people I am sure he said over 2000 people in one place. That must have been a night mare for the employees! I can not imagine that!
But at least he visited! and we had a couple of laughs. He dropped me off I made dinner, then watched some tv, Read the final chapters of my friends book the LAST SIRENS,and fell asleep.
I woke up to the computer dinging it was my friends in Costa Rica, at 7 am here is 12:30 midnight there so they were all happy, closing the restuarant, and partying! I was barely waking up, and suffering bad with alergies. I used to have those in the USA, never had them in Costa Rica. Now again.. I HATE IT!

I did not dance after Weds, episode of dancing and not one tip. I feel discouraged about it although its one of my passions to dance. I practice allot and I feel am getting pretty good at some of the difficult moves in Belly dance.

Hurricanes, Tornados, Rain May has been a disaster

Just about everyone knows the world is changing, With Global warming, and the demise of the ecology. But isn't it a fact that the world has from the beginging according to records. Changed? it has always been in the process of change. Evolving from one era to another, land masses moving, climate's varying from hot to hotter, or from warm to cooler. Weather forming or transforming areas that were once tropical to arid? Or once aird to waste land. The World, has always been in the process of change. Although now we are all more aware of the changes through technology, More Scientific descovery,Television, and man kind who are conciously involved with saving the Earth. Mind you I agree, doing what you can on your end has an effect, even though I have heard its impossible to undo what civilizations have distroyed. But I think its all a matter of evolution of the world. We can change what happens, not only in this, but in out lives as well.


But how do we stop Hurricanes, and Tornados, and Rain that doesn't let up? Is this all the process of past doings? Maybe? or Maybe the world is trying to tell all of us something?

I heard from three friend's in Costa Rica this past week, with Hurricane Alma, The distruction that the outskirts that this storm caused, it was miles if not Countries away. Today for example, its raining terribly again Here in the Island of Ibiza. The people here say its very strange, during this time of year there is rain but nothing can be done. My friends in Costa Rica said its been so bad, flooding, raining, landslides, colapeses, distruction on all sides.

I saw this week, for the first time in one City in Spain where they had hail the size of gumballs, it distroyed the vineyards, with freshly new clusters of grapes being formed.

When I saw that I remembered living on the Vineyard growing up and how my father would worry about rain and hail, distroying the fruit and the vine, thus reducing the production of fruit for Raisins or Brandy. This was Wine grapes here in Spain, so you know that this years crop is going to be expensive to produce, and the wine will be scarce. If not valuable?

So in this I am saying, Everything has it's value. My life has changed, I relate it to this weather change in the world, no its not all about me, but I do feel that change is ever happening, your life is ever changing daily, we can control things, and direct some things, but not everything I believe is in our control. Nature is a strong force, it causes so much distruction, Do we cause all our distruction, or is some of a part of nature?

Or is it the nature, the distruction causes changes, like the vines and the fruit that is damaged by the hail, the crop is deminished, but now the price becomes higher, and the quality of wine is reduced. Leaving only a small profit but a greater in value because the demand is still there. Ok so how does this relate to our lives? Sometimes damage happens to our relationships that are difficult to repair or replace. But there is still a portion of the relation remaining, like the vines with less fruit. Taking what we have and nuturing that instead of dwelling on the loss can develop a relationship, that might be different, but still is valueable.

I noticed, the relevance in the garden, when I was working in it the past few times. The weak plants that I cut back, tend to become stronger. So when we have had something disasterous happen to us, or if we are weak, should we cut back on something that we do, making us grow in other areas? creating a stronger feeling, or a stronger structure?


I honestly don't know where I am going with this, but in the garden, and with the world changing, weak plants tend to be attacked more than the strong. This is nature in itself with everything. The old addage only the strong survive, well if we try to do better, we will survive, in the earth as well, maybe it won't be exactly as it was but adapatation, and nuturing is bound to resolve.

This is something that is not easy to understand, but with change does come inventiveness, and adapting to what is left or what you have,may teach you something in the future and makes strength.

Just ask any old person, who has lived on the earth more than fifty years, and you will hear that as long as they lived things have changed. Its all how you deal with it and accept the change.

About technology, I believe in new things I love to see new inventions and ways to combat this or that. But still nature is the best way, some of the best remedies I have used for physical use was natural, taught to me by my family. Come to find out now the world is waking up to the same exact remedies that were handed down to me from them. Shall we move on and change, and remember some of the old ways of doing things, in order to retain what we have now?

YES, AND CHANGE HAPPENS take distruction in any form, build from it, move on but try to use the past as your teacher.

Weds

My days are pretty simple, I am sure there are people out there who read this and think how stupid! or boring. But My old life was one of an Event Designer, Floral designer, Landscape Designer, and interior. I worked many hours for lots of years some 15 hours most times per day, stressed about how I was paying for things, how I would accomplish this or that. Dealing with sometimes insatiable clients. Making my life complicated, and difficult. Many years of this.
Now It's the extreme opposite, at times I do miss that complication, silly or crazy at it may sound, I find myself reminising about old times. Yes it is sometimes boring, but very peaceful.

I am in a very deep mood today, Reason is, I practiced all day yesterday dancing to written coreography practing seriously. Trying to refine moves, working on correct postions to music that is strange to me. Arabic, but really interesting once you get into it. Its intricate, and stiring.

Ok so the sun finally came out again around 5:00 I packed all my things, walked to the beach, its about a 45 minute walk from here. The wind was blowing making the walk a bit more difficult than usual. I was trying to be in positive thought, not allowing my mind to wander about anything that is not. Actually I was imagining that I had a purse full of money!
I got to the Alegrea. Not very many people. I asked Simon to permit me to listen to some of his CDS of Indian and or persian music.
He hooked up the Computer outside with small headphones, and I sat, with sun glasses on and practiced in my mind with the music.
I waited some two or three hours. Finally people showed up. It was a little chilly so not many people.
I changed, into a pretty hot pink bangled laden, top and my skirts with the coin belts for dancing. Lots of silver jewerly on my arms and a belly necklace.

I waited more, Simon said not many people.
He doesn't do introductions for me so the people are not sure what the hell I am doing. I asked him to make an announcement that you have a dancer to get peoples attention but he drinks the whole time he is DJing and most things like this are un-important.
Finally after two hours of standing in my costume, I said please just put the music on and let me dance.
He did but right away not giving me time to stand or enter really wrong!
I didn't let it effect my dance, I began it was 7 minutes long, I was able to get some attention of a few people. In the end lots of people clapped. I continue to dance amongst the crowd, but no tips last night not one penny. I smiled and kept smiling but thinking GOD I NEED MONEY!! I had a guy offer a drink, honestly I didn't want it but I said thank you kindly. I drank a beer.. didn't want it but I didn't want to be rude. Perhaps he returns the next time and gets a clue that its for tips!
I stayed till about 10:30, Simon put on some music right before I left that was totally latin, Costa Rican. I felt good.. I danced merenge, salsa alone no one wanted to dance with me. I had changed my clothes and my pants and a sweat jacket. Then I walked home, in the dark. I walked along the beach last night carrying my belongings, thinking ok at first disapointed no tips! then thinking ok wow your in Spain, and your walking along a very peaceful area of a beach with no waves and how pretty the lights are at night. I took a short cut through a small field and it was filled with mud.
Got my feet all mudy, I couldn't see it was dark. Simple as this sounds I washed my feet in a puddle. Walked the rest of the way home, trying to hum, and not be discouraged. Although I really was.
When I got home, checked mail, nothing... looked to eat something but not much here. Ate a little cheese and some of those olives, a couple of waffers.
I laid in bed thinking now what!!! slept pretty well, but I do dream extreme here? I don't understand why. I have had seriously some very vivid dreams living here. Most are in detail.
When I woke up, I felt bored, I have alergies bad now.. I made my coffee went outside to see Ivan playing on a mound of sand that sits in the far center of the garden.
I watched him play, he yelled at me! As if to say GOOD MORNING MARIANNA! I love this little one, he is honry, and sometimes Mean but I love him. He really gets excited when he sees me. We have a nice little freindship this baby and I.
I watched him drinking my coffee, the sun is out the wind is blowing its nice. I helped Kathy put the clothes on the clothes line so they would dry before noon. In watching Ivan play so simply I thought about a bible scripture, that my mother use to qoute, and really came to a reality of my own about children.
If only we could be as simple as they are, not much concerns them, except food, drink, play and sleep. The love and afection of there parents, and others... how simply he was satisfied with playing in a mound of sand. Why can't we be more simple? why can't we be satisfied with just simple things? Remember this is coming from someone who's life couldn't be more complicated before. Rasing children pretty much alone, running a business, a house hold.. and more.. I actually began to cry a little watching him. Thinking wouldn't it wonderful to just be happy for nothing!!! sometimes I am.

Lots to say about nothing

The past few days I have not felt like blogging, The rain gets me down. I have been stuck in the apartment for almost three days. I dance Friday right? then Sat it rained the weather changed, and it stayed that way until yesterday at 3:00. I got out for a couple of hours two of the days, one hour here and one hour there. Only to be soaked in the rain. If I had warm clothes I would be fine going out, but I don't so I stayed inside. Watched TV, cleaned, danced some, and interneted. Been Reading my friends book she sent me Called the Final Sirens. It is not a published book yet!! But I sure hope it gets published, its Sci Fi, Fiction mostly. Very cleaverly writen, and super explicid. The style of her writing is so grippingly real . I am enjoying this book about the wooded maidens who spell bound men with there charm and magical abilities. I can see it as a movie actually, the details are amazing. The description of the wooded areas where these GRACEFULLY SWIMING DAMSELS LIVE, is deep in color and truly amazingly real in her portral of this acient land.

Now on to Simon, the DJ:
Ok he fired off at me the other night for no reason other than I believe he was lit, and didn't know why he was mad? He sent two text messages aplogizing to me telling me that I know he loves me. But I didn't have credit on the phone so I couldn't repsond, or call. Finally when the sun came out yesterday I took off for Talamanca, two reasons, one to see him the other to discuss this weeks dances. I need blank Cds thinking he may have some to down load my music I practice too.
When I arrive he was thrilled to see me, hugged me kissed me petted me, saying how sorry he was to be mean to me and worried that I was alright walking home that late. ( NICE BUT A LITTLE LATE) I just smiled said thank you, he asked over and over if I was angry with him? but my response was no, I was fine. Shocking to him, he kept hugging me. I was angy but I didn't want him to know. I was over it by Sat at noon. I couldn't walk my body was sore from the dance, not being use to much exericse latetly, and then walking so much. But Sunday I began to feel better the back not as sore. But I think I may have thrown something out, because everytime I practice now the back Kills me! I don't care I am still going to dance!!! So He didn't have CDS but I visited, then helped Alegria, the guys at Talamaca, clean up tables and glasses. They were swamped with people the SUN CAME OUT.
I had four people, ask when I was dancing again, I said Every week Weds, and Friday weather permitting! This was nice I thought. I walked home after four hours of visiting and talking with people.
Made some dinner, ate some
NEW SALSA:
I made this Salsa. You see they do not eat Chili's I love hot Salsa, picante, pico de gallo its called with Fresh tomato, Celantro, onion, chilis, lemon salt or vinegar. I looked in three of the markets here for Jalapenos, but no one sold them not even in the can. I found a jar of huge olives the olives were the size of apricots, with a skinny long chili stuck inside the olive wierd looking.. kinda falic! I asked if it was hot the clerk said yes.
They were 3.90 Euros, almost $6.00 for the jar, I said ummm no so I walked some half a mile to another little store and checked there they had the same for 1.60 euros so I bought them. I wanted this salsa bad I was craving something cooped up in the house for so long.
Came back picked the onions from the garden, and began making it. I tasted one of the huge global olives, WOW IT WAS HOT! but so tasty... Didn't try the chilis, funny thing is the process of the olives curing, caused the chilis to be mild and the olives to be hot. After making the Salsa, and trying it with what I found as Corn chips, very thin lightly baked I believe Corn chips. ( they don't sell tortilla chips here) it was very mild? I was disapointed. So I thought HMMM?? chop the olives very fine and put it in for the flavor, Well come to find out, IT WAS DELICIOUS with the little tibits of olives that were spicy. The Second day it was devine! So I made up a new receipe, So if you can find this Olive thing its called:Gordal con Guindilla, Gordal olives with hot chilis It says its made in Spain. VERY GOOD!! Make PICO DE GALLO CON ACETUNAS

JOBS:
Been searching online for anything, I mean anything! I thought well there are lots of Cruse ships here in the area, the come in daily I would love to be a cruse ship director. I went to the application department, and found you have to pay to put your application in, even if they do not accept it you still pay. Well today I received a invitation from a reader asking me to be there my space friend. When I read her profile she works for a cuise ship agency. I want to ask her if she knows how I can get the names of the ships around here and help me apply for a position! I was happy to see that letter!
I have not had any responses to any resumes I have sent, calls but no one sets up the interviews.
Other than this, I am writing, dancing, and trying to not be worried about things. Yesterday in walking I thanked God for just being here, that I live peacefully, and that I am well. Gratefull for whatever I have, its not much. BUT I AM GRATEFUL!! how drastically my life has change in the past few years. From Driving a Caddillac CTS sports car to now Walking, from having a home with huge garden, walk ways statues veggie garden, pond waterfall, deck, and BBQ area to a tiny small apartment with only terraza and pots. But over looking a huge rustic style dirt garden, with plants randomly planted here and there. Big change I have gone through but happy that I have dared to adventure and try something new, see new things and eat new things.
I am learning daily... more about life

Dancing,on the beach

Well I did it, last night was the first night I belly danced on the beach at the Talamanca Alegria Bar. There wasn't very many people, but I did the routines I practiced anyway. Simon was slightly drunk by the time I danced, he screwed up the music and had to restart it but it went off ok.. people liked it, I danced some three hours, past to other music, Simon kept telling me get out there. I did and made 50 Euros but someone took Fifteen of it off my skirt. It was tucked in the hip area, I did dance next to some guys earlier on and they probably took it. It wasn't on the ground I looked right away as soon as I noticed! so needless to say I was a little upset. Belly dancing is difficult. For the first time I did ok!

Fabio had called to make a date with me, only to say that he had plans with his friends and could he come in the afternoon at 2:00 to my house? I said no.. Meet me at Talamanca after 9:30, he said no he was going with his friends for a foot ball game. I said ok fine if like Call tomorrow.
He hung up. About some 20 minutes later he changed his mind, called back to say he would prefer my company and would be at Talamanca at 9:30 or a little later, I said perfect! I figured he would bring me back to the house, and In person I could ask him just what happened the last week when he asked me out and didn't show.
Ok So I danced, forgot about the date, but come 9:00 I remember he should be coming soon. I finished at nine thirty or a little before when I found out someone stole the money. I changed my clothes. It was really windy and cold on the beach. Super dark. I put on the little sweater I have and waited on a stool behind the bar not out in front.
Simon was finished he was busy chatting with someone, Well Fabio never showed up, I waited till after ten thirty. I asked Simon if I could talk to him and he got upset?? It was probably really lit by then. I didn't speak to him again after he flew off on me for no reason.I just gathered up my things, and began to walk home at 11:00 at night.

It was cold, windy, and I was sore and tired, and upset. I made it back to the house at almost midnight. No internet, nothing good on TV so I laid on the sofa, and fell to sleep but my feet hurt so bad it woke me up.
I showered my feet off, put some cream on them and crawled into the bed.
Didn't sleep well, my back is very sore.. I practiced all day then three hours. With out doing much exercise aside from walking its pretty rough on me.
I thought I would be doing it again tonight, but when I woke up the weather had changed, its cold and raining very hard. The reports said all day and night and possibly Sunday.

Making my weekend SUPER BORING, except! I do have internet now in the apartment. Today they finally got it right. But I can not go anywhere, I don't have transportation, although the landlords boy friend is a taxi driver. I wouldn't dare ask him to take me.. he is not super friendly.
The bus only runs every hour, but I never seem to be able to catch it even at the correct time.
Haven't had good luck with the bus here. Its always different times... and I was told that it is because its not season yet. June its regular.

Still no work, I been waiting, writing, contacting, but nothing yet. I had a call from that nice company but no return call for an interview.
Feeling lousy today, discouraged, and alone and super sore. I didn't sleep well at all.

The rent was due today, I paid but boy something better happen soon!!!

Weather finally cleared up its beautiful!

Well finally good weather, its nice hot and breezy. Much different than Costa Rica. The breezes here are some what cool right now. The warm hot sun, with a cool breeze now and then is very relaxing. I walked today from Jesus, it is pronouced HEYZUZE to Talamanca with the hopes that Simon and I could put together music for me to dance too, but hes too busy DJing now. I need to practice to songs so I know what moves to make. Improvision for me is easy but I want to do some correography so it looks more professional, making my tips better.

I have mixed feelings about it, one day I am super excited then today I felt unconfident, thinking its silly of me to do this! but I need to make some cash fast and dancing is so natural for me! I love it I feel free, but God its difficult to do the correct moves. I don´t have internet as of yet, so going to the San Francisco and trying to down load music is a little tough with people all around. I can not down load videos they don´t seem to store in the computer.. so I practice from memory of the Classes that Rossy and I took and from my past when I was a teenager. DAMN THAT WAS LONG TIME AGO!!

Still no jobs,pàtiently waiting. Been spending lots of time with Kathy the land lady, she is super nice so accomedating, actuallys likes me allot. And Ivan the baby can not stay away from my apartment or me. Hes a terror some times but I love him.

No word from the men I have met, so nothing to say about that, I did hear from Rossy, I miss her so much.

It will be easier to communicate now once the iternet is activated in my house. They installed it today but its not working yet, they said to wait 24 hours. So hopefully tomorrow or late tonight it will be working. Then I can Video talk to people my MSN is Myrnana84@hotmail.com

I have video talked with Jon my best gay I mean guy friend!! and my children a few times and Rossy and Raquel. I really like it makes it easier than typing.

I got the photos out of my camera now there in the computer but for some reason it won´t allow me to put them on the net. As soon as I get the internet going I will work on fixing them and start posting photos of Madrid, and Ibiza, the beaches, the places, the people, and the food.

Should make this more interesting.

Walking today was peacefull, the tall reed grasses that are mixed inbetween catus, and various sorts of arid plants were gracefully bending today from the breeze. It was warm but feel so good on my skin. I am so use to hot weather that this is nothing to me but the people who live here are complaining about the heat and its only been a day and half.

Right now the boganvillas are in full bloom the color is very intense, they stand out because there is not much vegetation like in Costa Rica. Not much green. The colors of some of the plants here are very bright, when I walk I notice everything I saw a huge tree.. with bright red blossoms and I could not figure out what it was. Walking closer, in inspecting the blooms I found they were giant Pointsettias All in tree form, HUGE!! naked from leaves only branches and profuse red blooms, striking from a distance. Also now all the star jasmine is blooming, the queen of the night, it is a large tree like plant with trumpets drooping in yellow, peach or white. We have about ten or more in the garden. When I come home at night from the internet, the purfume of these trees fill the whole neigborhood. Its very pleasant not overwhelming. Almost narcotic! I like the way it smells its dreamy.

I enjoy all the plants where ever I am and notice that I can recognise many varieties- But the bad thing is the olives are in Bloom, they have no smell that I can notice, but I found out this morning I had allergies, and I remember when I was living in Fresno California, we had olives at our house along with grapes.. which is the same here Olives, grapes, louqats, lemons, oranges, all these blooms I was allegic too.. and I had a bad allergy attack today. So when walking I took close notice to the olives... YES THEY ARE IN BLOOM!!

Hopefully no issues with them, I have not had allergies in alot of years sinceI moved from the USA...

Anyway on to life in the medditerrean! where the water is clear and the sand is white, the sun is hot, and people are half naked!!! WHO CARES ABOUT ALLERGIES!

Nothing much new!

It Is Sunday, the weather still is very ugly. Cloudy rainy, I am not enjoying this one bit! I do not have the appropriate clothes so its not very comfortable. I have been writing some, and practicing dancing. Walking when I can. Still no jobs, but I know it will happen. I am active almost daily. Making some sort of contacts as much as I can.
On the men front, well Daniel, my French, Spanish, Italian friend has been busy. Although he messages me occassionally. I haven't seen much of him. I really like him hes so special, great personality, and not to mention good looking! He saw me on the street the other day walking back from the store, Here in Jesus, he stopped dead in the road and ask me to ride with him to Ibiza town. We did, but nothing much, we just went in he was suppose to meet a friend. The friend didn't show. So we drove back, tried to stop to get something to eat but the places we went where closed. So he dropped me off at the house.
Haven't seen him since.
Fabio the one I met in the street the one I said is the type? WELL I GUESS HES NOT THE TYPE!!! he invited me for Friday, but at my house? he called on Thursday, our conversation was not the kind I wanted to hear actually. It was super suggestive, and I was insulted honestly. I asked him not to pressure me about SEX! that was all he talked about. In the end I said I will see you tomorrow. He said yes. But When Tomorrow came he never called or Showed up.
He still has not called to say what happened or he was sorry, or he was tied up! and Its Sunday..
I just hate it when men say right off the bat they want sex from me.. that is a total turn off, reason is work up to it... Bluntly saying I want to sex you, open line? NOT! not for me anyway. I know what happened, He didn't think he was going to succeed , so why show up and why call her? RUDE!
So I was a little sad for a day, then yesterday I took a long walk, I walked into town. I found a new route on a dirt road. I saw some old structures that were so interesting, I found a clairs in the down town and bought a pair of thongs making my walking a little easier. I also found a nice home design shop that was super reasonable. I took notes to come back and share with Kathy, so we can return and I can help her pick out drapes and accessories for her new apartment.
Actually nothing going on. I spent the day walking, felt much better about things. Clearing the mind is so nice.
I woke up today with a really bad headache, I ate some paella yesterday, so maybe its a reaction from the shell fish? The plate was the size of a cake plate it wasn't much, but the head is really in pain. I had one mojito with Kathy last night. It was her first. I made with with the fresh mint growing in the garden, she had the Rum, and the lemon. We only drank one so I know it can not be from that???
Sunday, I feel a little down today, the weather, the head, other things..
Could use the company of a good friend!
Missing Rossy, for some reason my mother too... she has been gone alot of years. I have been thinking much about her. Cleaver woman, creative, smart.. and in her day super beauty. What would my mother say if she knew how close I was to her home town? When my mother came to America, she never returned to her home land. I want badly to go there in Aug, Why Aug? I don't know but I have a projected date. I would love to see the city of my family. Perhaps meet some distant relatives? Learn more about the Culture. SICILY!

My state of mind

I waited for hours yesterday for Kathy to be ready to go into town. While I waited I sat quietly outside on my patio listen to birds, being very peaceful. My state of mind is so relaxed, I know it may sound boring to some but it is a nice reprieve from the life I use to live some 5 or 6 years ago. Although being stagnant is not something I like. I love being busy staying alive and keeping up to date with things in the world and up to date in general. Waiting some five hours, we finally went into town around 7:30 in the evening. We went to a furniture store and she was given three paintings because they had purchased so many pieces. She gave me one for the Apartment, its a nice start.
We walked throught most of the south end of town looking not finding much. I didn't have any opportunity to purchase, but I enjoyed the time with them. They really are great people. We stopped at this french bakery, had a espresso with one of their family memebers and we all enjoyed one pastry. Each one was like a piece of art, I had a simple Palm leaf, layered pastry that is hard and crisp. The rest enjoyed the most delicate fancy treats in the shop.

Learning the town now, and experiencing some of the better places that the locals go to, is always good. We returned in a hour and half, a short trip but a nice one. I sat with them in the house and talked for one more hour. Retired to my little place. Its very small ,probably the smallest home/ apartment I have ever lived in. But I am living in Spain, its sometimes hard to believe when I wake up in the morning. But turning on the tele, is evidence and verification THAT I LIVE IN SPAIN.. not a word of English! But still CNN in any language is clear to understand. The world is in a state of errors, I do watch, but can only absorb small amounts, even in Spanish its depressing.
I don't feel we can solve the worlds problems, but to solve ones own is a start. As menial as it may sound, I have no agenda to repair the world, but only to repair my own health and mind, and that will hopefully be an inspiration to others.

Daily I am learning new words, understanding more, you would think that living in Costa Rica I could understand the language here, but there are so many different dialects, and words that are purely strange. Example: Papas, Costa Rica potatos, English Patatas. Catalan. Carro, Costa Rica Car, English Coache. Catalan. It goes on and on. But it is fun to try to learn and only communicate in Spanish. I know I have stated before that also there are many French, Germans, and British here so you have alot to chose from when wanting to learn new languages.
So I will try to see what I can learn here and use.
I know I have learned to be patient, something North Americans need to learn. I see the British suffer from the same HURRY UP SYNDROME.

The Latin culture is a wait and be patient culture. Being in Central American taught me much, not all good but much. Now being in the south of Spain in the Baleriacs, it still has a small part of the old latin traditions. Such as the siesta, the luxury of taking half a day to enjoy.

Frustrating to me still, because of my American Influence and living. Thinking that the day is lost but to them its gained. There is always tomorrow is the additude.
You may wait for an hour in some places to get served. So what do you do? Think, watch, talk, try to get a drink your self first, many people smoke.. and smoke alot. I noticed that the calmer you are the faster you are served.
I may learn to like this, it seems to be a nice way to enjoy people more, have interviews, meetiings that last four hours over wine, beer, bread, olives, aoli, Spanish ham or tapas. or like I do sometimes a cup of tea.

Fixating on living in Spain

I am still fixated on the idea that I live in Spain now, yesterday was a real live epithany of my life.
Began a little late, I wanted to get up early but for some reason I sleep so late here, I got ready after eating of course, and walk into the center of town. I timed it for the first time yesterday it took me one hour and 20 minutes to get to the center. Its far, no exaggeration, I had on wedges, WRONG!! I really don't have very much now, I am not complaining only stating so its understandable. I gave almost all my clothes away, very little shoes, ones I knew would go with many things. I have four pairs only. So I wore some that rarely hurt but all that walking wow did me in by the end of the day. I had blisters EVERY WHERE!!! But the day was great!

I was walking into the center when I noticed a man, he was the type I have described on a paper of someone I want in my life. I saw him but he had no idea I noticed him. I was wearing sun glasses. I wasn't looking for anything I was thinking about the day. Finally it was nice hot and sunny and was so happy to be out. I noticed him talking to someone else. I walked past, and just said to my self this is the kind of man I was thinking of.

Ten minutes later I was in a little discount store just looking at lamps that were in the window... mearly looking for one minute or so. When I came out, there he was some three or so blocks away from where I saw him orginally. HMMMMM he thought the same as me, I was the kind of woman he wanted to meet.
He said Hola and asked if I would have coffee sometime with him, I said no not now but maybe some other time. I had some things I wanted to accomplish before everything closes up. He agreed to call me later and have coffee or something?
I did my things walked back into town, and he called.. ended up meeting at his office in the center, and having a glass of wine. I showed him my web page on the net, he said there are people in his office that have need of my work the would gladly talk with them and also below was a custom design store and he and the owners were good friends, he offered to talk to him as well. They work for the elite crowd that comes to stay in the Island for Holidays.

We had a very nice conversation, although my Castillian is not that great! he understood me..
He asked me out for Friday so I think were going to eat some where? He did call last night but I was busy and couldn't really talk so maybe today he will call again.
I explained to my friend TINA, that I am not getting excited about anything. If it happens it happens if its only a connection that perfect!
I did have a response from another company today that is setting up a meeting with me for work. Everyday I try to connect with someone.

Today Kathy and I are going later when the stores open back up at Five to shop for some things for her new place. I need a few things myself, shoes, clothes underwear!!! more...

Other than that I am in San Francisco right now the little corner cafe/ bar with great Spanish/ clasico/ flaminco music in the background. Its so romantic, I am really loving the music here, much different than Costa Ricas, latin merenge, Salsa, Mixes..The reagaton I do not miss! but all the other music yes.

Although most of the music here is HOUSE MUSIC, mixture of European. Some is ok, I like some not most.
Too much, but the chill out music is very nice. Very artisitic, and Inspiring to someone who has artistic tendency's.

Today is nice little over cast but nice, I am enjoying the day so far did laundry, cleaned up the apartment, nothing more. Waiting on calls!