Again in San jose

The site from the top of the mountain when coming and going to Jaco, and one of our mansions were doing that is Herruardo, and Tony.










Well I signed all the contracts and it is offical, the Store will open soon I hope. Were working on the details and also jobs on top of that.

Tony dropped me off tonight to stay in this crapy hotel, where the planes fly over alot. GOD I HOPE I SLEEP. I been chatting on line to my old friend Jon Dicky, he is hillarious, we were discussing Tony, and well his weird situation, how anyone could deal with this is beyound my thinking. But I am dealing with it, and Well I hope just Hope that Jon is wrong. I think that Jon is worried that Tony may try to take advantage of me, and it may be a difficult situation for me to continue to deal with. BUT I AM STRONG, and all I know is that Tony has helped me tremendiously, I don't understand our arrangement, but what ever it is I am riding it out and enjoying it while it lasts.

We work together, we play together, we eat together, and dance together, laugh and do many things but nothing intimate. He stays about 6 days a week in my house, goes to his house one day or so and returns. He loves the work and what we do, so I am not going to knock this untill things are no longer good. At this point things are great, would like it to be different but hey you can't have everything I guess!

I found the most beautiful things today, I connection for Stone floors and stone bathroom sinks, and back splashes that are so beautiful. I found a importer of furnishings that were stunning, and bought a killer chase lounge, louie the 16th, all leather with rolled pillows for the show room. ITS OUTSTANDING PHOTOS TO COME.

I also met a gal who does very refined custom leather furnishings and I may have contracted her to make these chairs I wanted for the sala, the living area of the store. I will see how much she wants I bet its not cheap. But the fact that it is all custom made is such a cool thing. Yep Tony and I ran around all day, for some reason he was very tired, I don't know what it was but he was extremely exhausted and I noticed yesterday as well, he was not him self. Didn't respond much and didn't feel like working, Just one of those weeks.
Me, my stomach has been bothering me alot, don't know what it is but it tends to hurt bad right after I eat.

I heard from Jordan my younger son, he told me that Julian is walking all over and showed me online with his web cam. It wsa so cute. Julian is a very happy baby with blueish eyes and dark hair and round round face. Jordan is tired, working alot, need to get some excersize I see it in his face. He said he misses me alot I told him I miss him too and was happy to finally after all these weeks talk to him.

Will be going to the States in November, not that I really want to return to do the Holiday work but I am going to do it cause I need all the help I can get now that I am commited to this place. I would like to see my children, but I think I will leave that up to them. Its a strange situation as well, I love them but I know there busy.
I will be in Portland for 12 days, I have no desire to spend Christmas there, I really know why, Its the weather, its the memory of How the holidays are and well its just not the same for me any more with the kids.
It sounds cold and selfish when I write this about not wanting to do Christmas in Portland but, the relationships are strained, no one gets along, I love them all, but there are still bad feelings. Even towards me, honestly I have tried to be good, tried to say Im sorry for whatever I have done, I flew to Portland for my sons birthday but the response was not like I thought it would be. I thought perhaps things would be good, that My son would be happy that I was there to see him, but we didn't talk much at all. and Well I left with a lump in my throat thinking that it was a mistake for me to try to surprise him with my presents for his special day.

In saying this, I want to clarify that I will continue to love my children no matter what the problem is that they have with me.. Maybe they have none, but I wouldn't know since the communication is so little that one would think something is wrong.


On to a lighter subject...
The food lately has not been good to me, the only food that taste good to me is Tony's or mine. We had dinner several nights with two different couples and it was fun cooking for others.
We actuall cook well together, Tony is a great cook.

I saw Milo this week did I mention this? It was a dumb situation, he didn't apologize for his actions, he didn't complement me on how nice or cute or anything the hair nothing, he didn't ask if I wanted to go to restauant and talk or have a drink and just have some time to discuss how he felt, but he did invite me to his hotel and to dump Tony. In my thinking he is really wrong,
What a way to treat a lady one he says is his sould mate??? Later After Tony saw my face and saw how I felt, he said Hey dont be sad... he tried everything to make me laugh, then He then asked???
Did he asked to talk to you or apologize for the way he was before? I said no and its as well, Its obvious he is not for me. I cried a little not because of Milo but because the disapointment of men.
Tony right away tried to do something to make me happy, I thought that was cute, but It didn't work I needed time to think about this ridiculous situation that I allowed to happened.

Well the rain is making nice sounds on the roof here in the hotel, I suppose were going to get an early start in the morning. We have alot to accomplish tomorrow, then return to Jaco, and Thursday is filled up with Meetings all day, the architect at La Flor and my architect, the owners of an office were doing, a sign man, a window man, a constuction guy and one furniture maker, and the owner of the manison that is posted. Wow ok why did I move here????