Well Good bye Costa Rica

Last night was a flop, I heard that Rosie told people there was no party? she didn't want people eating her for free so no one showed up except her and Raquel, I was so disapointed and sad and she knew all the time but didn't say a word. It was so strange I felt horrible... Then Later I ate and drank my self and this morning recieved lots of calls saying when is the party since it was cancelled? Ok I am not saying a word to Rosie I am forgeting it and moving on. I did exactly what I had to this morning, Packed cleaned up got a truck to haul all the plants and benches to a company I sold them too. Yesterday I sold the bar and the sofa to a new company they signed a contract to make payments and I have a another friend collecting the money and depositing it in my bank account. It has all worked out so perfect! I am so pleased, after that I had the hair done the toes down then walked to the bank.. Now I am on my way to buy my bus ticket and pick up the computer that is now repaired. The land lord informed me he has the new Camera as well and so I have to pay the RENT DARN IT! but oh well everything is going to be fine.
I am not stressed, feeling fine a little sad about friends but ready for a new adventure and as one reader wrote the pearl that I began is going to grow into a precious pearl of my life!
Thank all of you for reading and I wish all of you the best.
I will pick it up as soon as I hit the grown in Spain.
All my love, to you and God bless you
Marianna

Trying to accomplish all you need to do before you leave

I am trying my hardest to accomplish all I need to do before I leave Costa rica, and of couse this is a slow country to do anything. I didn´t feel well yesterday to finish all my packing and so I laid on the cold tile floor and watched my 46 inch lcd tv for a couple of hours to regenerate. Its so hot that I am exhausted,and not fully recovered from the Surgery. So its taking alot out of me...

I had a taxi pick up take things to Rosies little grocery store to store stuff while i am going its not alot in comparison to when I lived in the states but its amazing how much crap we all collect. WOW For me, Its kinda sad really I am not taking photos because the frames wieght too much, I don´t have a camera the landlord didn´t replace it so Tomorrow when I exit, I am saying where is the Camera? if he says he doesn´t have it then I will say I am not paying for the two weeks I was here. Simple as that the rent is less than the Camera, he owes me!!! Also There are many items I wanted to take with me as memories but its too heavy. Clothes even... so I thought oh well look at it this way Marianna, when you came you came with hardly nothing and look now how much material things you aquired! so things come and go..
I am baging up clothes because I know they wont work there, and I need new clothes. I hope I do very well and have not one worry about buying a thing! I beleive I will so what is the sense of hanging on to old things?
So when I got up I started right off the bat out of the bed to organize the huge pile of clothes shoes and junk that is all over the floor because there is no furniture in the aparment, only a bed and the microwave and the TV. So its everywhere! I was befuddled, drank some coffee and then began the best I could again.
I waited for this gal to call to come and pick up the TV and some chairs but never showed so I got showered, dropped off a few things at the laundry, went to the store bought all the food for the dinner I am cooking to night at Rosies, HER IDEA!! and went to her restuarant and cooked up the sauce and prepared things.
Then I went to the Century wrote up a contract, for the bar I sold!! and then booked my hotel in Madrid.
Now I have to go and have the people sign and give a deposit, then hired a truck to deliever plants to Raquels house.. I have so many there big tall trees and urns and more.. beautiful things I can´t leave them with the Land lord.. he doesn´t appreciate a thing and hes rude. Never repaid for all the damages, allowed me to live for months with out a stove, so i rather give them to her and she can remember me by that.
Then at Five I have to go and prepair for the party, I still need to get the TV out, pack my clothes organize and put things in the storage at Rosies. I am tired really but I promised Rosie Italian food before I left.. It would be nice if people made a contribution that came like a donation or something since I paid for all of it!!! but hey its ok in my mind if they don´t Its a party.
( just a thought)

Tomorrow I have to make sure all the lose ends are done, then at Ten go to cut my hair and dye it, and get a pedicure. After that make sure things are all finished and then go to San Jose for the trip.
I hope Ken lets me stay with him and save myself some money, and the trip`on the bus.. plus taxis. He did say I could.
I still don´t have my computer the guy called last night said it was done, that he would try to come today if not he would send it in the morning tomorrow, and I would have it by noon.
I HOPE SO I NEED IT!

Have heard from five people on my email that read the blog and wrote me personally, saying they support me and wish me well and pray for my safety and success! so that was great. THANK ALL OF YOU VERY MUCH! I love you, and i sure feel loved. One of the letters made me cry the things she said were so touching and so sweet. She made me sound so nice !! AMAZING I think I am nice but not that Nice LOL!!
BUT THANK YOU DEAR I love you much too you know who you are... keep in touch all of you and be watching for the first blog from Spain. I believe I am staying in the centro, there is a quartro, were there are restuarants, bars, shops discotecs so this should be so cool! Museums are close and everything is walking I AM FAMILIAR WITH THIS SO THATS GREAT!! un like most USA Citizens they do not walk much. Here walking is the way, driving is great I want a car but I know now that walking is so much better, keeping you fit, and healthy and you see far more, it creates freindships too because people talk to you when you are walking.
Its just nice ok
So I will try tomorrow to kiss COSTA RICA BY BY if time permits.

Still have things not sold

I had to go to San Jose yesterday for my check up on the Surgery and everything was fine, I began thinking about all the other things I have done, instead of looking out the window, and admiring the country side, I closed my eyes and began to remember all the things I have done either for the community or accomplishments that were not material gain for me.
I remembered working with the chamber, on beach clean up with local school children. I was active in working with the Turtle reserve and the preservation of the beaches in that area. I helped organized the committee for this. We were very successful had over 250 or more children from various schools in the area.
I helped with the battered women, I wrote and still write and inpiration column for a local magazine, for life and living in Costa Rica. Reason´s for living and appreciating the country.

Many times I donated clothes and food to many different poor people here in the country. Also to the churches, I help this one woman who wanders the streets here she is obviously a drug addict but people make fun of her, she is half naked all the time and is black as black can get, homeless and talks to her self. At first she hated me, cursed me and use to flip me off when I would try to look or talk to her. But now she talks so sweetly to me, because I have given her food, money to buy water, or even bought her sodas and more. Many times, one time she needed some personal female products so I went and bougth them for her. THERE IS MORE THAN HER ON THE STREETS that I have shown my charity too.

I am still going to work with the Chamber here after I leave, on a program that I want to develop to raise money for some of the children here in the country. I talk to them today about it.

I left my mark in several places here one Museum that has my handy work out front that the who ever drives by sees, and right now its on a front of a magazine for advertising for the musuem but not for what I did. But I was proud yesterday when I saw that.. I thought its not always about Money. Yes that fed my ego but I thought that will be here for years for people to enjoy.

So in returning that was a mess, miss the bus, in this taxi the taxi chased the bus he said to stop at this store so we did and bus passed us by... Leaving with a taxi bill that was more than I had. I had no money to eat. I tried to exchange the ticket but they would only do it for you to stand for three hours no seats. So that is what i had... While i was waiting someone grabbed my purse, I was upset and ready to punch! When I turned around it was a friend of mine in Jaco! so sweet she was scared thinking I was really going to punch her. Then I explain the story and she treated me to lunch and we walked around waiting for the next bus.
IT all worked out I was so tired last night that I didn´t accomplish anything in Packing.. today ether because I been trying to book a hotel in Spain, and sell things. So tonight I will get things together for leaving my apartment tomorrow.
Raquel has a small place now so I will go there for two days. I leave on Monday afternoon to San Jose, the flight is early Tuesday. I missed a day? didn´t read the ticket right! GOOD THING I LOOKED AT THIS MORNING!!!

As I read I am amazed

AT The comments that has nothing to do with the beautiful story I painted with the pleasured t that filled my eyes. Who is to judge what I do? ONLY GOD so please!! I have to laugh.. this blog is about the daily life of one woman who has the courage to break out of the box, adventure , seek dreams and fufill them. Simply that.

Ok on to better thoughts!!! I am sure I will sell everything, I had a very intersted buyer for the bar I designed and I am positive they are going to purchase it. That was one piece that could be difficult to sell but I KNOW I HAVE IT SOLD. I was please to find out the woman that wants it is from Italy, she is a super nice lady and is going to Italy in May, She told me to give her my email and she will tell me when she is near.Possibly visting me there in Spain.

I have another job opportunity there, it sounds very interesting so I am feeling super positive about this adventure. I have been proactive in writing to many people about jobs, apartments and more so I am sure I will be fine. If not, GOD WILL TAKE CARE OF ME... he has for years.

I want to say something to some of the readers who really know me personally, and not family memebers who have percieved ideas from childhood. For Example Jon, and Cyndy, and Linda, and and Wade, and many more who really know me... I want to thank you for your super support of my endeavors, you are pure examples of love. You are what the world needs more of. People like you are the balance of all those out there that are so negative and so puritanical that have no real perception of the what the world we live in is like. I am glad to have known you, I am blessed to have people who really love me. I have said to my children, it doesn't matter who or what you are doing to me, If you are happy with what you are doing and feel it is right then I am happy for you. This may be wrong to some people but for me, when I find my child, or friend who is very happy with their life then by God I am happy for them as well. I celebrate it.. I mean it This is really All I want.

So be happy for me, I am doing something I dreamed about for years, Dreams come true. Only if you set out to make them happen.

Today was odd I spent the day at the Century, I no longer have an office but I waited on people to show up to buy furniture and to use the computers there. While I was there two Of the guys who work there got into a fight, a real fist fight right in front of me.. it was about stealing money from a commission. Two ticos yelling and going at it, I remained calm and watched, the one other woman in the office got into a panic and began to scream... I watched I knew it would end. I really didn't like one of the guys and was almost happy at the fact that he picked a fight with the other ! but in the end it was not resolved and one stormed out of the office all ruffled, in the blazing hot sun. IT WAS EXTREMELY HOT TODAY I could harldy walk... so I am sure that that was a part of the tension combined with anger over the behavior of the other guy stealing the money.

That was the excitment of the day, it has ended with me at Rosies of course visitng with lots of people.. and enjoying my last days here with my freinds. Rosie is sad, doesn't want me to go.. But I know she is going to come and visit me she hinted around to it SO THAT SHOULD BE A BLAST!!

Well have a good night

I haven´t writen in a few days, because I didn´t have access to a computer, and I needed to rest a bit after the trek back from San Jose.

I want to say this though, Imagine if you can a tropical enviroment that is so full of plants and beauty. I am going to try to describe to you what I felt and saw on Sunday as I rode in a city bus filled with locals, and only one tourist that I could tell was a tourist.
It is about a two and half hour drive to Jaco, through the city filled with buses and taxis, cars and people walking on the sides of the freeway. Then through a small mountanous area winding road to an area that is very high and above the city over mountian tourribari ranges that is about aproximate 4000 feet. Then drops down to sea level after a few little rolling hills.

When we drove through the outer parts of the city, I filled my eyes with the trees that are all in bloom right now. Pink fluffy blossoms, that are similar to Japanese cherry, and bright yellow blooms that only last one day the gold of Coronado, the Lavender flowers that fill the whole tops of trees that the bark is so intensely brown, to see the contrast of these trees is incredible the Jacaranda, has got to be one of the most beautiful of trees. Stately arms, blooms that are profuse! I memorized the color´s the smell of the air. I tried my best to smile while in route to recall the best of the sights of Costa Rica. I could smell all the flowers that are all in bloom now. Seeing birds on the wires singing, The wave of all the different palm trees, I think I counted about seven different varieties on the way. I tried like hell to draw in my mind the different leaves of the palms and how they sway in the wind. Going over some areas, that were filled with boganvilla of super bright colors, my favorite is the bright hot pink and orange together. Almost phospheresencent, glowing- the way or the angle of the light here right now of the sun being at the axis were at seems to make everything more intense for me. I studies quickly the colors as we wizzed by the masses of boganvillas in Atenas, Yellow, white, red, hot pink, orange, bright purple,pale pastel pink, lavender, even a pale peach. So incredible it fills the eyes.
I saw all the little puppies in gardens playing now is the time for all new birth even though right now is summer? I don´t understand it but I see it, I saw lots of chickens, and animals on the way. I am not kidding I was smiling and thinking even though I could dwell on all the bad things that had occured, I did some pretty amazing things and saw some really incredible views, and adventures. If I was to weight it out I would say IT WAS STILL A SUCCESS HERE, I did alot more than I planned on doing.
I think my last week or so here in Costa Rica is good, I did something I wanted to do a year or so ago. I had all my teeth fixed at nearly an eighth of what it would cost in the states, I did a tummy tuck at nearly less than half, I wanted that for almost 30 years! I sold many jobs in counting in three years about 28, or so.. I bought the best furniture, the best t.V.S the best Computers, the best of everything. I lived on the beach for two years, I lived less than two blocks from the beach the rest. I had a beautiful office for a year, I nice car... Good friends, met lots of men, lots of people from all over the world! I have done some really great things so its not all a loss. Plus I had a perfect Sunday drive where I saw beautiful scenery for me to remember, and now on the end of the week a nice party with some friends to say good bye. I have to make up some invitations, to hand out to everyone.. It should be at Rosies.

I had a repsonse from an email to someone with the same name as mine, my mother´s and she lives in Sicily where my mother was born, they have apartments on the beach there and she has writen me several times now, I am very excited about this new adventure... I think its going to be really different. Maybe even more inspiring than I can conceive.

So anyway Costa Rica is a beautiful country, aside from the rubish, and the thieving, I still think its beautiful. I know I may not find the fruit or veggetables that will be as good....The coffee is sublime! I will miss that.

About that last comment? I am not sure who wrote that, but if you know about ancient philosophies you will find that its about how your thinking and there is a saying where there is a will there is a way. THE WAY IS, what you think. Our paths I am finding is how we think or believe. We create those paths. Just an observation that JUST NOW I AM FIGURING OUT!

Ready to go back but THERE ISNT A BUS!

I am so ready to go back to Jaco, Ken is really a very interesting person. He has told me stories of New York in his youth, how they robbed people. How they assaulted people, how they tricked people and on and on this man has no scruples.

How in the heck he become my friend? He has always adored me and is genunine and shows me respect.

He insults most the society of women , but never to the point where it's not directed at me. He puts down everyone and everything, but with me he never says anything rude or rotten. I would love to interview this guy and find out all his history because it may make a great movie or book.
The only thing I would think is maybe the USA governement would ban some of the information because, it would give youth of world the wrong influence and details on how to be distructive. Right down to how to make a bomb.
I never realized the true character of this guy! WOW

Ok I just listened this morning while we sat early around 6:30 am and had our first cup of coffee made in the old Italian style metal double decker pot. He dispises USA, yet he watches the news channels with all the gloom and doom, the economy, the race of the presidency, the floods, Everything... yet talks about how he hates all of it? Confusing some of the things he says it conflicts with how he behaves.

I can say this some of the stories were replica's of episodes of the Sapranos... in just one hour or less he told me roughly 20 different situations that he was involved in during his youth of age 14 through 16 and I am sure there is more. It proved interesting, but sad too because of this family structure. Although he is in his late 60's I think or early 70's he is in great shape, Thin to small frame, dies his hair black whats left of it, wears the thick old style glasses. He does have a sence of humor but it is laced with hate, and mallace.

I need to go home but he doesn't want me to go yet, he wants to go the Casino, I don't gamble, I don't find it entertaining one bit. I know several people that have been in my life at one time or another and they were so call social gamblers, not addmitting they had a problem and denying that they were addicted to it. I don't really care honestly what he does. Its his dealings. I just find it fruitless.
His partner Marcia, wants me to stay too... but honestly I think I would heal faster out of here!!! although yesterday and today they have left me here alone so I feel super good!
I honestly wish I could write about his history... its like fiction but I know its all real to watch his face as he goes back and recalls these events, you can see his whole face change with the memory and the emotion he felt while he was doing what I call Wrong doings. For me It is wrong to him he finds nothing wrong of stealing or robbing, assaulting, threatening, or more. This was while he was a young man but now in listening to him it is applied to other things like he refuses to pay anything.. so it goes back to his childhood of doing every malicious thing and getting away with it and to think he was a millionare? This is his qoute" anyone that is honest has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!" I said oh like me he said yes! you have nothing!! I said I dmay not have today any material things but I have in my life many things and I have accomplished more than most of the average woman. Mind you I am not ophra, but I had, some really incredible successes. But not all financially.. He conciders me a moron.. although he never says that.( in the respect that I have not much money now) Yet he loves me he has said that, says I am funny and appreciates my occassional snide remark towards him.
He finds that amusing although it never provokes a fight. NOT MY INTENTION only to state once in a while that I think he is rotten!

He does have a kind side, he loves his dog, his so called girlfriend, but I found out he has others on the side... he has been very hospitable to me even making the old fashion way of popcorn like my mother use to make in a huge pot with olive oil. PERFECT!! made it twice for me because I said I love it.

He does has some virtuous qualities but only a few!!!!

On to another subject PLEASE!
It is very different here for this holiday, they don't die eggs, they don't have the Easter Bunny, and not alot of Chocolate is sold. Some pastries, and traditional breads for the Holiday. But its all about Christ, the only reason for the Celebration. Although the people party like crazy during this time of year. Rosie called me said Jaco was buzzing with people so I suppose that is great for her business! They honor the holiday with no sales of Alcohol, so I wonder if the Casino is open tonight? I would think it is closed? Most things are closed nothing is in operation in honor. The liquor is sold after 12 on Monday. So what most people do is stock up before...

I have not drank anything in a couple of weeks, in preparation for my health and surgery. So for me it doesn't effect!

Ok well Happy EASTER! kiss someone like I said before, try to show love to someone even if its difficult it will change who you are.

GOOD FRIDAY

Being in San Jose is like being in another country, its cold here not like summer at all when this is our summer season In Costa Rica. The wind is blowing and all morning it was cloudy very cool. I am not use to this because I live in a tropical beach town where right now its about 100 degrees or more with hundred percent humidity. So my blood is thin, I don't have a jacket, I own one sweater if you can believe that, and one little tiny sweat jacket. I didn't bring it because I thought its summer here so I am cold. Keeping the windows closed went out walking yesterday for a bit that didn't last long I was freezing not use to the cool weather here. Ken and Marcia live in San Carlos near Escazu so its breezy here. They have a small condo, nice. Today I am alone which it totally fine with me. Listening to Ken's complaining about everything, including women is a downer. I try not to listen to him because I want to heal fast and that input is bad for health. So when he talks I just tune him out and think about flowers, birds songs, anything that is pleasant... men money anything!!! No exaggeration this guy is a typical NEW YORKER WOW... he can say more hateful things than anyone I ever met. I don't enter into his conversations I just let him blow, after all he is being nice enough to allow me to stay a few days. THANK GOD MARCI doesn't speak english because if she did she would proabably kill him. I told her today THANK YOU GOD THAT YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ENGLISH because you are much better off not knowing than knowing all he says.

Aside from that!!!! I am feeling better today I sure hope I can go back tomorrow. I am suppose to go to Puerto Jimenez for a guy to find some property before I am off to Spain, this could be one of my irons in the fire I suggested in earlier blog.I feel almost good enough to day so possibly by Tuesday I may be able to go for two days then return to Jaco.

I am trying to send out messages by mental abilities to anyone in JACO TO BUY THAT SOFA AND BAR!!! I want that extra cash! besides I don't want to leave it there for Century to disrespect and distroy while I am gone, I catch them all the time with there feet up on this four thousand dollar leather sofa... its not theres its just in there for storage and the owner wanted it but now he doesn't want to pay for it. SO I HAVE TO SELL IT I WANT the money!! I am so focused on selling that.. HAPPEN PLEASE HAPPEN!!
I was thinking about good Friday, its a day that wasn't so good honestly... here no one works period, they don't work for a week and day On Monday they are still celebrating the Semana Santa. In the States, Half a day for some for Good Friday, and Easter is Sunday and this is all, But her its starts on Weds, the week before. For example today everything is closed, there is hardly a car on the streets, no bycycles? no buses? so how do people get around and just what is everyone doing? I am doing nothing on the internet talking to my son and his gal, typing letters and blogging. Soon a nap! This was not a word in my vocabulary when I was living in USA. I kinda like it now!!! short little rest wow I feel great! then dinner watch a movie and call it good.

But I know this coming week is going to be so different for me.
The body from the surgery, the flight perhaps to Puerto Jimenez, the packing the sales of the rest of the stuff, then off to a new adventure! I have alot to do... contact the vistors tourisum board again, fill out papers so I can do some promotion, Talk to my friend about the office there for refferals, contact my friend about her remodles of Condos in Spain, Make sure all my loose ends are tied, like phone bill, power, and well say good bye to my friends here who I will miss.

Orginally when I told Rosie she was mad, then she said lets have a big party you cook!!! I said ok but now? I don't know but I do know there are some who will miss me... I told my children finally what I was up too, the youngest is COOL MOM! the older I have not heard from. I told his partner, but I have not heard from him. So I should call tell him personally.

So hey Have a GOOD FRIDAY! and be Happy celebrate! life is short. KISS SOMEONE YOU LOVE AND DON"T LOVE and see how different you feel once you did! try it !!!

Hearing about the man who has his life for sale

I heard about this guy who has his whole life for sale, and I thought about myself, this is almost the fourth time I have picked up and sold most of what I own to relocated to a new area. Although they made him sound so unsual.

I have more to add to a story than he does and no one has writen or done a television interview with me. Hell I picked up and move to Third world country with out hardly knowing anyone and made a nice go of it. I learned so much although my friends and family in the states my think differently! I realize how selfish people are, how they are so materialistic, I am too! but I have the capabitity to let go of things and not be completely distroyed or feel as though I have nothing in life. For me there is more to life than all the material things, but I do need them and I do desire them. I don't know what it is about me, but I can shut off the pain of not having much or the pressures of the Culture I was raised in that said you have to have this or that in order to be successfull or recognised. Does this make sense? For example I had a little surgery Yesterday, I had to stay in San Jose. The place I called for a reservation never returned my call. The Doc, ecommended this place for its integretiy and its great service. It is a nice prestigious place to recover!
Fortunatly I friend of Mine Ken, has a place in Escazu, he said you can stay here while you recover for the next couple of days. Ok Here is a man that was once or maybe he still is???? but lives very megerly now??? was a Millionare. He showed me Photos this morning of all his cars, and mansions in the states, when I asked where all his money was, he said he bought shit here. His exact qoute. I was shocked I said why would you sell all that fortune to live here so simply? He said Material comes and Goes and he found someone here he loves. He not a positive person I can tell you that. He is from New york, has a horrible additude, and doesn't like a thing... But he is kind enough to allow me to stay in his house. I think My point is, he was one that had so much yet gave it all up to come here. For some odd dream?

Like myself, but Now I have found that I want to see more of the world, I have very little personal belongings. I have sold all my furnishings, and my office supplies computers, and furniture. And I am on to other things. Like the guy in the news story, they made it out to be such a big deal when here I am a woman, I have done it already and now I am doing it again. I remember years ago, I always had dreams of traveling, always! But didn't know how I would do it? I never dreamed of me just doing it alone... or at this level? but hey if you want something bad enough, like this guy's new life. You set your mind to it, believe and I mean just believe it and it will happen. All you have to do is believe.
I know that what I am doing is not for everyone, but I also know there are many people out there that wish they could just up and go and do something different. YOU CAN JUST DECIDE, Think about what you want, make it happen in your head first, then it will come alive.
I have always had this ability, but lost the knowledge of who was several years ago. So caught up in stress, working like a dog day and night. Always worring and struggling this is not life. YES WE HAVE TO WORK, but I heard something a few years back and it came to my memory today. In the states you live to work, in other country's they work to live. Having all those millions for Ken ment nothing as time went on. I think what I am getting at here is the guy who is selling his life, and myself who has sold mine a couple of times to make changes, and Ken who was worth Millions and now has very little. What is the life? is it all about our material gain? or is it what we know? I feel people get so attached to there material items, in life that the items become in control of them. You work to support your material things and not to live period.

So I want to work to live not live to work, I want to enjoy things to a level that is ectasy, where food is new experience everytime I eat, where seeing things of beauty become a total inspirtation to write draw and express myself in a way that influences others. I want to dance and sing to a point that thrills not only me but everyone that sees me. (have done that people are really happy when they see me dance!) More or less, have nice things but not allow those things to be incontrol of who I am.
DISFRUITA LA DIA...
enjoy the day, live and know there is more than that Mercedes sitting in your driveway. Or that huge boat that is taking a monthly chunk out of your pay check.

Getting down to the nitty gritty

Things are going little by little, I been cleaning out things and wow amazing how much stuff you acumulate in four years. Its too much, I realize that we are collectors. I gave away this morning to another church about five bags of clothes. Shoes, sandals and just things. The past week I gave away four bags of all sorts of house hold things.
I do have a few things that I brought from the USA that have some sentimental meaning to me. My deme tas cups my mother gave me, a set for a bar an x boy friend gave me. Crystals that I had when I was a teen ager, Cooking Items I wood burned when I was in my mid twentys, an Chinese kimono that I bought when I was 16 that is probably about 100 years old and few other items that I will take with me. Its just a way for me to remember times in my life. I do have some photos but the The camera that was suppose to be repaired here, I found out today its not possible. I had about 175 photos of Costa Rica, my grandson and Kelsey and my sons and daughter in laws on there and more. That is all lost. So I felt a bit sad. The computer is not repaired so I think in the past few months I call it a total Material loss here.
I am not taking very many clothes, I figure why I will find other things there and probably much nicer things so hey going lite.

Its been different, I am wondering if I will return but I have left behind quite a bit of stuff so I may have to. Besides Rosie is sad and so are a few other people they want me to return. I do have a couple Irons in the fire, I won't speak it out yet. But it does have to do with Returning and begining something new. I am still holding on to my dream I had years ago... I won't give that up. I believe that will happen.... I just have to decided when it will happen. Maybe this will be such and inspiration for me that I will develope a whole plan and be able to pursue that dream. I WANT IT TO HAPPEN.

Its super hot, I am so tan just from walking... I have to go to San Jose today, I sold this computer so I will will working out of an internet cafe soon.
I sure hope my lap top can be repaired? I would dare to buy a new one but here the price is so high its ridiculous.

Wish someone was coming from USA and bringing me one!!! that would be Ideal!

Been having a nice time. Almost sold everything!

I still have the red leather sofa set with built in end tables with leather on them and the huge ottoman for 2 grand, I paid almost 4 thousand for it its so beautiful! I really want it sold now... I have the huge bar I designed with black granite on it wet bar below, chandelier that looks like branches, drop lights that match that goes over the bar. A handpainted conical shaped sink that has tropical flowers on it its all ceramic incredible. Its pedistool style but Conical really different. the huge painting and two small ones, a rustico, Costa Rican wood bend that is like art work. And huge plants. I want these sold now! But other than that, I been enjoying the days, sunning alot, swimming and doing areobics, The body is looking good, the face too! so I am feeling good about life.

I always miss my kids, I just wish they would contact me and see how I am doing once in a while. Strange our relationship, it probably goes back to when they were little, I worked so much not much time to spend with them. I have beat myself up for years over this. Felt guilty and actually had arguements with one son over it. But is all in the past and its never to late to regain relations. I would just love to talk to them often.

I been spending time with Rosie, we belly dance on Sunday and always go out to eat after, drink margaritas, and laugh. She is going to miss me, she is trying to convince me to stay and work with her on a new idea for a business for me... but I want to go and explore see new things and then come back if I feel so. Yesterday I went with a tourist guy I met some months ago to Manuel Antonio for the day. He returned to see me . We had an ok drive, he was rude and very short, when I asked to stop and buy a mango, or stop and walk on the beach in Esterillos. I was trying to show him around and let him experience more than just Jaco. He was not responsive, and wouldn´t stop for anything. I had not eaten breakfast, because I had to have a blood test in the morning. We rushed off after that, so I needed to stop and get a little something. I won´t go into the details of the ride as it was very negative, I didn´t argue I just became quiet and from that third try, gave up and decided it was best to not say anything and just ride. So I set my mind to enjoy the country side, soak in all the beauty of this country and memorize as much as I could so I could at times take my self back to here when I need a thought of joy and enjoyment.

RELISHING THE MOMENTS:

I watched the white cranes fly over and studied the wings and how they moved so easily, gliding through the air. I smiled at the long eared Cows that sprinkle the pastures and low lands.
I felt happy when I saw the small green parrots scurring as fast as they could the next tree top.
And all the lush green vegetation that fills the whole country, smatter with flowers here and there.
IT IS as I said over and over a beautiful place, but it has very difficult situations that Americans are not accustom too.

I am waiting to my computer guy today to down load all my photos on to a disc, so I have record of them and maybe print them for keeping.

Today is just, waiting for people and no one is showing up, so maybe I go to Rosies for a bit, then the beach. Wait for calls and meet people.
Tonight I may go out, been long time. Tomorrow is Belly dancing! It is super hot now!
Rained like hell last night, cooled everything down and cleaned everything up

The nature of life

Its a small world and I believe that things happen for reason. Some of us, including myself fight life, I am so trying now to not fight anything. This dang book is amazing.. I reccommend everyone to read the Secret. I have met in the past week so many people who have read it and have such a positive additude towards life in general. The nature of life depends on us.. The good thing is found this out before I am so damn old I can't enjoy what is surrounding me. The world is an incredible place for sure, and I am so thankfull that Tina sent me this book. I realize I said this before, but I am saying it again because so many great things has happened since I read this.



First I want to say the sale of all my personal Items is amazing, the only advertising I have done is phone calls to friends, and passing out a inventory list to real estate agents that I know here in Jaco. The reason to sell is That I want to liquidate everything I own, use the money to see more of the world, and obtain a new adventure! I dreamed about Costa Rica made a plan and endede up here. I do love the country the food and allot of the people. But in thinking?????? I said to myself the world is at my command, I forever wanted to travel and enjoy other things see culture see and experience a new way of living. So why not? I have no boy friend no husband, there is little work here now because of what I do. So I can change directions and do something entirely different and learn something new in life again! I have no problem with change, and in fact I love it! I also for many many years wanted to see Europe, the Euro right now is super high so changing my dollars to Euros is a smart thing.



I am anouncing that Six weeks ago I had hardly any money after reading this book it changed my thinking and my approach to many things. I decided right away that I want to see something diffferent, and make a plan.

So I did I went to the travel agent and discussed options, I found the Balearic Island's in the Mediterranean sea. The waters are clear celeste blue, the summer begins in May it so Close to Sicily which is my blood.



So after talking to some friends, I found out I have two people who live in those islands, Mallorca, Minorca, Ibiza. I contacted them and set up a place and now as I said in an earlier blog I was offered a very interesting and different job. If this works great if it doesn't I will not worry again because I know who I am and As my son said I CAN DO ANYTHING!!! The job is helping tourist gain information about Costa Rica in the European market.



So I purchased my ticket weeks ago to fly to Spain first, then to the Islands it is one hour from Barcelona Spain!!! My plan is to take two weeks and go to Sicily, then Italy for a short time, then If I like it return. Also I may go other countries too. the opportunity with this job is huge. I have not told my children yet, they haven't talk to me in a long time. Only Sara, and I tried to call them on Saturday many times but I couldn't get through.

But I figure, they have never visited me here yet, there is not much communication only instant messenger with Sara so what is the difference if I am here or there? Not much the difference is... more miles, but so much more to experience and see! So wheeeeeeeeeeee here I go again!

The sales of all my items are amazing, Everyday someone calls or comes It has been effortless to sell. So I am almost ready in a few weeks to Move on to the next adventure... Thank you all of you for reading, and I want to tell you I enjoy doing this so much! I want the future to be better for everyone who reads this. As soon as I can I will working on the books!

I am so excited about this Adventure, I have the money I have set in a goal in the bank and more is coming! so things will work out fine.



I have a return plan as well, I contacted the Los suenos, they are wanting me to do the holiday decor again, also Best Western is contracting me too! I plan to come back in the end of Novemeber and who knows what will happen after that. I may spend some time here for the summer, since I love hot weather, and then return to Spain or go on to another adventure.



Your saying right now ok shes nuts! No I am a mature woman, who has worked my whole life since I was 10 years old in the fields of my father, to swim instructor, to hamburger shacks, on on since then. My Children are grown, have lives of there own, and now its time for me. Never traveled always said and thought I don't have enough money, My mother instill that in my WRONG !!! I have enough and I want to see, and I can because nothing is holding me down! I want to enjoy my life I deserve it! So I said ok I will make this happen the same way I did about Costa Rica! and amazingly ITS HAPPENING, my friends here are sad, some do not want me to go.. but I think this is great, I have two friends there, and I am easy to make more. So whats wrong with having friends all over the world???

It's wonderfull! and I am so pleased to see my family's heritage in Italy and Sicily. I found out the ticket from where I will be round trip is only 85 dollars so affordable to take a week or so.

So now, this will be Marianna from Costa Rica to Espana! Italy! then Maybe Austrailia..

It is true it is not fabrication, I will have my camera tomorrow its all repaired and as soon as I arrive I will post photos of me in the sites.



I will be leaving Jaco on April First, at 8:30 am

ITS BEEN A GREAT couple of days

THE LAST couple of days has been very good for me. I been really doing lots of thinking, and selling my personal things. I have a plan, a very exciting one, and after Sat I will anounce what it is.

I spent time on the beach yesterday just sunning for two hours and relaxing and thanking God for the opportunity of seeing this country. It is so beautiful here, I realize that I have the capability to do anything. My youngest son is my best fan. He believes in his mother. Always when I do talk to him which is not often,he confirms almost every time MOM YOU ARE GOOD, You can do anything mom, I know you and I know you can do ANYTHING!

I just wish he had that way of thinking about himself too.

I have been cleaning out closets, and organizing, simply preparing.

I had a little offer today from a nice company here to do some referral work for them, but its not here in Jaco. We plan on having a meeting to discuss the details and figure out the concept for the new idea that we both came up with.

IT IS SUPER EXCITING TO ME, I want to continue writing, I really want this to be a huge part of my life, and publish these ideas I have for books. The first one is the history of my career as an Event designer, wedding designer, and Flower shop owner.

Some of the tales I have in the almost 28 years of doing this type of work are mind blowing and extraordinary. The life of the flower business, events, parties Weddings is not an easy one. Glamorous as it may seem, ( it is in the final results) this life is a hard ball game, and in many circumstances there are bizare, scary, and some wonderfull incidences that can and do happen. Although this book may not be for every one of course, the women in the world will relate and adore some of the stories I have. And believe me I am putting the real deal in there, but changing names of course. I will say this I had some SUPER UNUSUAL HAPPENINGS that one of my closest friends Tina, got to experience right along with me. That was a scary one and we both to this day talk about it.

I have two more books both of sexual content, real life experiences that are only things that some people dream of, and or read of but have never experienced. I have one I just thought of the other day and its a totally flip side of this. All inspirations for those that are weak of heart, and it should inspire them to step out of there cave and reach for what they desire.

I want to be successfull with this, my passion at the moment is writing, and I would love to return to something that was my passion many many years ago and that is painting and drawing. Right now I have one painting I did here in my office. It is about, six feet wide by five and half feet tall, its all done in reds and some yellow blended in, I did it with silicone sculpted with a knife, then let it set for three days, then painted it in layers, so the colors are inbeded in the silicone. It has a large balmoral style letters in the center A B Absolutely Beautiful. My Trade mark, and I call it the circles of life, eternity. It is framed in a dark wood bamboo looking product. I love it its one of the first pieces I have done in many years. I have it priced at $700 dollars. This I want to continue doing, it makes me happy to see the ideas I have come alive. Its very modern, contemporary, in real life it has lots of texture. I would like bids from my readers, So its for sale I want to hear from you if your interested?

The weekend

The weather has been so hot and so nice, but not much tourist here. I had a very nice weekend. Only one day two hours at the beach, but it was great.
I been selling my office furnishings and doing pretty good with the sale. I have things and money set aside now. I enjoyed my self with Rosie this weekend too. Raquel was a mess all weekend worring about money and her departure to Spain. I tried to encourage her and say look I am a living example of how things will work out if you chose to believe so.
I preached till I was tired of preaching... but she is so strong headed and stubborn.. I know the Horoscopes are not suppose to real or maybe they are? but I can verify that she fits a perfect Taurus the BULL HEADED... so argumentitive and super oppinionated. But I love her, and I keep being as positive as I can. Not submitting to her negative thoughts and words.
I went on Sunday alone for a morning walk, I took my books, and my baithing suit.
First I walked to this new little place I found on a side street and its sits like in an alley. Small soda restuarant, I had my fresh Fruit pineapple, mango, Papaya and a little banana, one egg, one toast, coffee with milk. Relaxed and enjoyed every minute of the food, the breeze that blew through plant lined counter and the opposite side of the little soda, they have lots of ferns hanging and lots of tall tropical plants. With a few round cement tables and benches and some traditional wood tables and chairs.
After I walked to Rosies, had another Good COFFEE, and read a bit. Then to the office to get on the computer since my Lap top is crashed crashed crashed. I played for some two hours, then went directly to the beach. I laid in the hot sun but nice gentle wind was blowing and I thanked God for the opportunity of being here to enjoy this gorgeous place. I began thinking about how I was before I came....

Let me explain:
Super depressed, bordeline suiside because of cold weather, rain, gray days, no companionship, few friends and little contact with my children. I wanted warm sunny place beaches and tropical life I didn't know.
I dreamed for a year about this, I would close my eyes and invision I was there and I BELIEVE I did this through invisioning... ok I know how to do this!!! I was slightly over weight but not very much, I wanted my teeth fixed, I wanted a tummy tuck.. I wanted to be tan.. Well In thinking yesterday I DID ALL THAT!!! wow ok thank you for this!!!! I thought about how I would wish for things and dream about them... but suddenly here a year or so back I lost all that and this is when everything slid down hill.

Well, Now I see and I mean I really see... and I am gratefull for the beautiful time I have spent here. Good and bad.. I learned so much. Which I will use in the future to create a better life for me.
I had someone ask, how come your not in USA with your grand son and grand daughter( not yet but when they marry she will be) I said hey.. my kids have there own life, I have worked really really hard my whole life. I supported them and raised them practically alone for the most part I did.
Now I have time to still enjoy things and I desire to see more, do more and live different ways. I am adventurer, and I am now living out one of my visions and who knows what will happen but if I set my mind to it IT WILL HAPPEN.
I want to finish the book,I have a feeling that is the answer to money. It is much different than the blog.. the blog is actually just how I talk. I know the grammer isn't perfect but who in this world is? I know the spelling is not correct, but the stupid spell check on the blogger dosen't work,and most times I am in a hurry when I write this, so I don't put it in a file.
But this book could be a support for me, and I have another one in my mind, but its very sexual. That one will probably make more money!!!! I have to do both, I may have a third on my mind as well.

Ok back to Sunday! After the beach I walked to the house Raquel was lazin on the sofa again, I encouraged her to get up and get her clothes ready to go.
I left for my Belly dancing classes, I returned late to an invitation to a party in the LOS suenos.. so I got ready invited Rosie and Raquel and we all went to this super nice party and had a great time. Wow that is the life I want. Beautiful Mansion of the house with huge pool and jaccuzzi, guest house on the right and huge separate mother inlaw house on the left. sitting in the mist of a well trimmed jungle with lots of flowers and plants nestled against the hills. WOW the lights at night emphasized all the trees, making forms that were almost comical.
The food was good but Rosie told Everyone , When Marianna Cooks you scream she loves my food and here she owns a restaurant. She told everyone I tell you this chef you have is good but I swear Marianna is better.
So nice!! I was pleased. I have made some pretty incredible things here with all the fresh product and fruits the pastrys everything.
So we all had a nice time coming home very late.
Today I been concentrating on selling this office furniture its not like you think. ITs leather sofas furnishings for a home more or less. And I may have about 2000 dollars of it sold. I pray and thank God for tomorrow. For the sale of it all!
I have started a class like Jazzercise now, and I love it.. so I go tonight at 6:30. I am pretty sore from Yesterdays Belly dancing. Believe it or not that is a really tough work out. Because you have to concentrate on how to move muscles you don't realize you have and it has to be isolated so its hard. Then all the leg moves wow my ankle was killing last night at the party but the jaccuzzi helped.
I want a pool and a jaccuzzi!
So I think I am getting pretty good at the belly dancing. Its so intense, and teaches how to flow making every moment in the body fulid.
So that was the weekend

San Jose for the Day

Yesterday was a great day, it started out pretty early about 6:00 am to prepare for the Bus ride into San Jose. I had a doctors appointment, Raquel had to get all her papers for her trip back to Spain. So we went early as the ride is two hours long. I only had three hours sleep the night before, I went out to dance but no one danced with me, I saw my friend Carlos Rojas and we chatted and took a taxi together home. We talked at the house for a while then he went home, I went to bed at 2:30 I couldn't go to sleep thinking about the plan for the week.
So only three hours was not great on the bus. I didn't sleep on the bus either because three or four loud Tico guys were laughing, talking stupid and making noises. I was exhausted in San Jose but we had a great breakfast at an open air restuarant on the boulevard,this is a street that is blocked off the cars and only people walk, shop and eat. IT was windy and cool. We had fresh papaya, watermelon, orange juice fresh, coffee with milk, and cheese, a crossant egg, and ham. Things are in small portions but I still didn't eat it all.
The cost was 2000 colones, four dollars. Not bad for the view, the food. We then walked about and looked at things, window shopped. She went to the office to gather up vouchers, and tickets for the plane, I sat in the central park enjoying the warm sun and breeze. I watched all the people looking at all the pigeons. Tons of them flying about, people feeding them corn. The Theatrical museum is close, a water area and trees. It resembled something in Europe. So pretty so pleasant, I almost fell alseep while I waited. in fact I did, I caught my head bobbing! But it was interesting to watch the snall children with the pigeons. They would flock all around them almost scaring them and they would laugh so hard..
I thought about my Julian and Kelsey how they would be screaming if they were there.
Nice day.

Then we went to shopped a little more, I bought some earings for one mil, 2 dollars for three pairs. Raquel had the nails and toes done while I drank a refreshment in an open air Columbian Restuarant. I walked around looked at things while I waited patiently for her.
Then to the doc, she walked to a book store and bought the book that Tina sent me the Secret, in Spanish. So now she is reading it too... Funny! I guess its good!
We had a great dinner at this little place on a corner in Rohsmeir, Taco, spanish style. Really nice place we drank a couple of beers, and took a taxi to the bus station in Down town San Jose. The ride back I slept thank god!!!! then we walked about four blocks to the apartment and came in to rest. I feel asleep right away.
This morning I woke up pretty early about 7:00 to the sound of someone digging? it was Robertos Gardner in front of my apartment. He took out all the parrakeets, mini birds of paradise and replace them with tiny little bushes.. UGLY ok not appropriate for the area, and they are sun plants this areas is only shade. THey should last about four months then be dead like the parakeets. I wish he would have talk to me first I could have recommended what is best there and would look super cool. But who cares its his issues not mine. But now is not as pretty.
It is fine , I am about to leave this expensive apartment in about 3 weeks. so it doesn't matter!!!!
On to the beach, I never made it the other day I waited all day for someone to show up here and he didn't so I missed going but today I am for sure taking in the sun and the breeze!
Love to my children first, then my friends... My sisters