I bet your wondering what I am doing

I have nothing much to say about USA, Being here for one month and a week, and have walked alot. One day in the pouring down rain with cars splashing me and being soaked to the bone. This weather here is just ugly. WHERE IS SUMMER? OR IS IT ETERNALLY WINTER?
Although I can say I am thankfull for the help from two of my friends Here in the USA. One of them has helped me so much in many ways, by being a true person, a normal person , good friend. Laughing, talking, taking me if I need to do something, being genuinly kind, drinking wine, discussing new business plans, encouraging me to be strong and keep going. Actually including me in when things are going on.
I have been working for a company here that produces Food and Wine Shows, www.northwestfoodandwine & www.montereywine.com
It has been a very good expereince. I really am enjoying broading my horizon's by learning more about Food and Wine. My job was to do spread sheets with contacts, and make all the media contacts for there show in Monterey. This has been different but easy for me and very good for my spirit.
It was really interesting and fun to contact the many news papers, magazines, Television and Radio. I would send Vip passes to important people, and send out the press releases. I just thank god for my friend's who has been such a help and blessing.
The other friend Sharon my jazzercise owner instructor friend and I in the past month have grown very close once again. So my dance energy that I used to Belly dance has been diverted to doing Jazzercise, not has hard but good. I enjoy the music. The gym I created for her is pretty much still the same. I would love to do some changes to it in the future. She still has the article I wrote for the news paper here on the entrace to the gym, with my old photo next to the column, and the photos of the before and after. That kinda warmed my heart when I walked in the first time. The point that she had left it up.. just nice.
I am glad I have made friend's with her... I have also talk to Clint he's is being very kind to me too, actually fed me a couple of times. He's really a good cook!! We both walked that day when the rain poured, and car's splashed, till our clothes were sticking like the hair on a downed rats. :(

Then the boys, their the same, dealing with life. My grandson is very cute, sparkley greenish eyes, he tells me to walk over almost everyday. He asks me if I can come over, I respond "don't have a car "and his repsonse is " NONNIE JUST WALK ".


.. Hes growing fast. He will be three in Oct.

Love him...

Beauty part III

Los Estephanotis
Jaimes Birthday Party in Santa Gertrudies

Dont go Marianna, Ivan tugging at my surrong, the last two days he senses something, and has been very agressive towards me. He knows and is not happy.
Another windmill Rustic old window in a garden fence

The oil took on the color and the appearance of scales fish click on the photos and look close

Yesterday was a sick day, I had the worst Allergy attack ever! I was sick all day, I packed got ready for Thursday. I slept a little durning the day I was so alergic? don't know why?

In the Evening was a party for Jaime and his friend they work together in the taxi business, he is also married to Cathy's Neice, his name is Martin. We all drove to Santa Gertrudis, and ate at the same place where I showed the photos of the cheese, the doughnuts, the burro and cart. They had a very long wooden table reserved for all of us, some 20 people. They brought out the olives green briney in small bowls, then asked what every one wanted to drink. I had a red wine the house typical Spanish, Everyone else had Shandees, (Lemonaide with beer.)

AS everyone gathered, talked and laughed, they brought out pitchers of Sangria. Sangria is Wine with other alcohol, seven up and fruit. It's strong and really good. Everyone began pouring glasses. I was so sick all day I thought maybe this would make me feel better and I was right one or two glasses of that and I felt so much better. Then a few moments later, the watier brought out platters.

We sat and talked and feasted on huge platters of bocadillos, Rustic thin toasted bread, smather with crushed tomato insides, no skin its mixed with a small amount of olive oil and salt. On top of that is a selection of, either cheese slightly melted, bacon, lomo a thin slice of pork or beef, sauteed with green onion and garlic its very thin, or hamburger patty thin, an Jamon, (ham) its the Spanish style, salty good.. and or Tortilla but Tortilla is egg or potato not Mexican style tortilla, it is an omlette of egg or egg and potato and its on top of the crusty bread.

Everyone enjoyed these snacks, I ate two one with lomo one with cheese. Very good it's lite but crunchy, and flavorful. This was all we had to eat but the platters were piled high with every selection. tThen came the cake, or they call it the torta. It was huge, three layers lite white cake, with whip cream inbetween the layers, then topped with this velvety lemon glaze . IT's the best! All I can say is that I ate a huge piece and wanted more... I would to make it for my families, It's a cake everyone loves.

When we left I walked along very slowly listening to all the people in the town plaza, It was almost midnight. People were chatting, eating, drinking wine. It is customary to eat late, I thought to myself " remember this night it was special" an experience to talk about for years.

Beauty in Unusual things Part II

Some of the smaller yatchs, These are huge to me but they say there smaller
Caracoles, in art form
cosmos in the night
Rustic style spanish home with turret
Caracoles I see a heart

The port and me
My bathroom and me
Spanish Hams

This is near my house, all the hams cured in salt and aged at least one year
I am trying to remember as much as I can before I leave, I have such a wonderfull feeling about the people who have taken me in the past three months. Cathy Jaime, Ivan have become a great second family. I want some how to thank them for all they have done with me and for me. We eat together every day and night, out doors in the dark with candles at midnight. Tonight Jaime suggested to take me to the port and walk around see the people look at things and eat. Tomorrow is his birthday we are going back to San Gurtrudies to have a celebration with family. They have taken me under their wing so kind and generous, I thank god for them. Cathy has literally opened her door to me any time I want to come back, She wants me back soon and stated it. She said confidently MARIANNA YOU WILL BE BACK WITH US.

In the Port:

We went walked for more than an hour, a little borning because there were so many things I wanted to buy for gifts and I didn't have cash. We ate at a typical Tapas, bocadillo restuarant,and then came right home , they rushed off to bed, and now I am cleaning things out and putting it the suitcases.

But back to Today:

Still pondering COSTA RICA, I really do miss it allot. My eating habits there, were very different, I realize in going to the USA where there is so much fast foods, chemical riden fruits and veggies, I am going to be very difficult selecting what I eat. I enjoyed so much the variety of fruits, fruits I never imagined exsisted. Unusual shapes, colors flavors and so many remedies from them and other vegetables, herbs.

There is something called Nonnie, I had photos of it a potato looking root, with many profound eyes on its pale skin. You take this cut it up and boil it, and then cool off the liquid, add a little sugar, ice and drink it as jugo, or here a zumo, Juice. It is suppose to cure cancer, and many other infirmaties. It helped several people I have known there and myself. There is much to learned from nature. The ticos use nature for cures.

For sure all the beauty, plants, flowers, bananas, palms, cocos, animals, such as the monkeys iguanas, parrots, peacocks. Will be etched in my mind for the rest of my life. The early morning walks on the Miros moutain, that leads you straight into the junlge is a life changing experience in itself. I remember the first time I took Clint there, how he was amazed at the bird, wild life, and plant life. We sat in the dirt under the shade of enormus bananas,in the early morning watching butterflies the size of your hand float through the thick humid air, painted an irredesent blue and black, then tiny little delicate red ones flit about the Iguanas that were bathing in the sunlight. Clint was in total amazment, Me too although I had experienced it many times before it still amazed me and delight's me now to think about it .

Everytime I walked in the jungle there On Miros Mountain, I saw new and different things. It was always a spiritual moment for me.

I believe this will help me in dealing with Vancouver, when I feel down, I must rememeber hot hot beaches and how warm it was climbing up the roads in the jungle, seeing dozens of monkeys playing and feeding in the morning. Hearing Tucans calling each other from the highest points of the enormous tree tops.

And of course recalling all the interesting people I met and made friends with. I sure hope it helps me when the weather is cold, rainy dreary. This is something that is very difficult before for me to deal with.

Only two more days and I return. But it will be so nice to see the Boys, the girls, My Kelsey and My Julian!

Beauty in unusal things

Ibiza from the Castle I live on the oposite side straight ahead in those foot hills
A memory of the past, still exsits in many areas and they function

Colorfull bouganvillias splashes of refreshing color against the stark white Spanish Structures

Statis I cut from the garden along with Abuelas onions
Abuleas braided Garlic

The cannas in Cathys Garden
A salt worn rock that was taken from the rough rocky edges of the Mediterrenean Sea, planted with Catus
Onions from this years Garden, that are sweet Although I am in Spain, many thoughts of Costa Rica are passing, I am conflicted with memories of both. I feel that what I had set out to experience has not ended by any means yet. I must return to USA, but seriously in my heart I have love for the Spanish Culture. I will return, and I will see Italy and Sicily. At this moment I have no idea how, Money is the real issue. But I know that in my past when I believed in doing something I made it happen.

I Have so much to say really, these next couple of day may be lenghty. So many thoughts are passing through my mind.

Costa Rica: laying on the hot volcanic beach, wading in the warm tropic waters, eating fresh green mangos with salt and lime, that is sold by people who walk the beaches. The dark skinned Nicos, selling many items as they walk the beaches and the streets. Waking to the sound of birds, large red and blue Macaws, screaming in the heat of the early morning sunrise. Tucan's in the near by trees, and entering my apartment to take a bite to eat of some fresh pina. More..... the colors, the fruits, the flowers, thin cattle grazing in the fields, and the jungle itself. Waterfalls, Rivers, the beaches that I loved so much. Not having bills sent to the house, not one paper bill, no mail boxes, riding in taxis that were cheap, buying weekly fresh home grown fruits, veggetables, fish, chicken, eggs, honey, and drinking the pure juice from the crushed sugar cane.n Meeting people from all over the world.

Of course there is as much bad as good, everywhere in the world. Yes I did experience some horrifying situations by American Standards. But I prefer to look at the good points, the life style change, the weather being warm all year round. The Latin food, Music that makes anyone want to get up and dance and forget your troubles.

Enjoying doing nothing but visiting with friends in an afternoon coffee. Or an evening any time of the year sitting outdoors.

Seeing real poverty and actually being with people who literally live off the land.

I spent the weekend three time's in Cristhians Fathers house. This house sat in the jungle, near his grandmothers, uncles and most of the family who lived in this zone for many years. The roads were all dirt, like most of them in the country. Huge pot holes, rocks, its really sort of fun to drive on, challangeing and dangerous too! In the onset of seeing this home, all I could do was think about all the luxurious homes I have worked in, all the fancy houses of clients, and ponder if they could see what I am seeing, what would they think? If Cristhians family knew what a life I had previously would would they think? I was shocked at first, Dirt floors in the kitchen, minimal items in the house. Walls of old wood with cracks in them, with rays of sunlight filtering through, Windows but no panes of glass. Water but only from a rustic tube that came up from a river. Chickens walking about the kitchen. A wood burning pit for cooking, and a old sink with attached faucet that drained right into the dirt. A modern Refrig, but not much in it. Sitting on a beat up old table was two pineapples that of course a family member gave to them and these pods of the palm tree they would boil and eat with salt mayonaise, a tortilla and coffee. Me,Sleeping on the rough bare wood floors, and wondering if they the family were really happy living like this?

They dress as normal people very clean, smelling of purfume. The shinny hair of the women from an oil that is applied to the hair to keep the hair from puffing up from all the humidty.

The life is purely simple, they are happy, I was curious but never questioned or made comments. Only obseverd, and was part of the family. A few times I bought rice and beans, honey and pure cane sugar in a block form for his grandmother. When I saw the pen with the pisquene, an animal like a large rat, I was mortified at this, I had eaten in a small soda and didn't know what it was. It is a delicacy, and something not all the people grow. IT IS DELICIOSO!

I experience many situations that most Americans would be appauled over. But respected , and fit in tried to enjoy what simple pleasures, I could gain with situations I never imagined. I was not offended once, I just accepted what it was and really tried to be as sincere as I could.

I was welcomed into many peoples homes, and offered whatever they had to eat and shared right along with them.

Spain on the other hand is opposite, Same language with a twist. Many hisses and lispt but its intended, The culture is present but its a modern country, with up to date living, The Real Spanards are forward. Strong people, The Ibicecans, real ones are kind and generous, lovely people. Most stick to the culture, but enjoy the all the modern convienices. The infrastructure is great, Highways are perfect, with many round about's these prevent accidents, something that is needed in the States. From what I see the infrastructure is very good, security here is good, rate of crime is low. There are no bars on the windows like in Costa Rica. I am sure there is corruption, its present every where in the world, but not as evident as it was in Costa Rica, or USA.

The music here is devine, a mix of modern pop, latin, and flamenco. I found a group I am completley in love with called Chambao, If you have seen a video of Ricky Martin this thin little woman singing in Spanish? this is the group.

Music has played an important role in my life, So the influence of this music is new to me, and I really love it. They also listen to allot of House, Euro, chill out music here. Before in the states My fav first was Jazz, then pop, and latin. Hip hop yes, I am what can I say a music lover Although only liked a very small portion of Country... Just never really liked it! sorry... but I appreciate there are some really great artists.

To some people I am sure this Rubbish, but when you have a burning desire to try something or do something and you succeed, the memories of the good points are something to savor.

My thoughts on life are ever changed, even though family still perceive me as this Who knows? horrible person? but if they had seen what I have seen, or been in situations that I have placed my self into to know that my mind has been affected by the countries, the people, the total experience. They would understand that I am not the same Marianna as when I left some years ago.

commentor: Opportunity for what? running from what? rifs? the only opportunity is to be with my family, which I miss, Thank you for your comments, But your completely wrong.

The announcement of my decision

Going back to the states, because of various reasons. I won't go into the details, but I will be heading back. I leave on Thursday morning, its a long journey to Vancouver. I fly into Seattle, first then I may have to take a bus or train to Portland. Honestly, I will say I am torn, because I love my new friend, My surroundings are peacefull, and so nice. I must return, I am now so endrenched with the Latin Culture, that I am scared of how I will adjust to the Ways again of American living that I grew up in. Although I was very fortunate in my younger years, of having a wonderfull Family and groundings. The cultural influences of Italian is evident when I reflect on the life here in Spain.

Now to return to something, I disliked so much is going to be a bit strange in the begining again.

Although it does not mean I can not return to this lovely place. After sharing with Cathy when I leave we both were sad, but she is a marvelous woman, understands my situation. AND SHE ENCOURAGED ME TO KEEP GOING, that I was a valiant woman, and to please return to her house.
This place is an open door for me, she said last night if you want to come back the apartment is yours, if I have to get rid of someone, if not you sleep in my house. We are friends not just landlord and renter. I so love this woman, I have learned much from her in the short time I was here.

Also My friends in Costa Rica write or message daily, I miss them too, Although its difficult at this time to live anywhere! not just in Costa Rica.
Europe is Much better than USA, and I will not be afraid to admit that I am worried and scared of how I will live.
My children will of course be some what happy, I hope?

My ideas of going to Sicily is still strong, I want to see where my family is from, and I am disapointed that I did not meet my goal, but I have not given up on the hope. I AM NOT DEAD YET!

In going back, I have already searched for jobs but I can see its not very good in the states. Lots of restuarants looking for help, of course people have to eat, and its summer.

I will be very happy to spend time with Julian, and Kelsey. I hope I can be a small influence in there lives.

I repeat I am torn, I miss the family, but I will miss this latin culture, music, food, and some of the kind and different people that are not like Americans.

I hope I can use all my experiences for good, to be a kinder and better person to other people. I do not want to fall back into what I was before I left, Stressed, worried, aged, sick, Tired, hatefull, and very negative.


I speak the language here very well, and find it more interesting than English, so that will be missed too.

Keep Reading, I am not dead yet!

I want to impliment what I have learned in thought, Work to live... not live to work!!!

My space

The Apt is so nice, Its small the smallest space I believe I have lived in but its perfect for one person. I would love to own a place like this. I keep it very clean, I try to be orderly for only myself. I have only had two visitors since I lived here. One was Maekala and the other Simon.

Simon is not longer working at the beach, Someone turned up his equipment loud the night of the Championship Soccer, the police came and took the equipment. Causing him to loose his job. He is very upset, I don't blame him it wasn't his doings. He had warned people that the police had set rules for the volume, but the people who work Talamanca are, lets say abusers. Twice I had money stolen, and I am sure a few of my clothings and some shoes, were taking when I stayed there. This is now a normal thing for hotels. The workers feel free to take what they chose and no one knows who did it. Simon now may return to London. I will miss him, He has not brought his laundry over in two weeks. So I hope he hasn't left with out saying good bye.

Maekala, I have't seen since the nail trial.

Mostly Its just me here, with Cathy and Of course Ivan.

I sent a note to my grandson, he has a my space, I was suprised to see it. But I dont know if mama has read the notes to him yet. My space is cool, I like it. But MY REAL SPACE HERE IS very nice.


I think I am going to the beach today, I need some time to think, and meditate. Resolve some things that are going on in my mind. But first I will practice my dance its great exercise. Something about oriental Dance, it is technical, takes lots of concentration, and really works on all parts of the body. The memory that the muscles have to do the moves in time is amazing.

Today is a contemplative day, one of full on positive thinking to change my path.

Images of Ibiza

The Images of Ibiza are beautiful and different, from the life I had in Costa Rica. The food is devine, and so cultured. Lots of it is reminsence of my childhood, growing up in an Italian American flavored enviroment. We eat lots of Olive oil, breads, tomato, olives, with oregano. My childhood was a good one, and daily I have reflections of it when I spend time with Cathy and hear her stories. Eat her food, and share moments.

Yesterday was a day of many thoughts, I love my dancing, it went ok. It was not what I thought but that is fine. I enjoyed the 40 minutes that I worked for nearly nothing. The place is fabulous, but the crowd is one of Upper crust, with noses in the air. I don't care I had a nice time. So I was thinking about this, and about all the images here, the efforts I have made in looking for work. I am sure its not just here the whole world is in depare. But I had a really effected day yesterday. The details I will explain in a later blog.

The air here is very warm, lots of breezes but it is only fresh in the shade. The smells of people cooking because of the heat really fill's your nose and the air.
So daily you can smell onions of Garlic brazing, and fish or strong meats. Its lovely honestly.

The hillsides are present every where from any stand point that you are looking, they are not high altitudes, but are high enough that when you are on top your vista is of most of the Island. These hillsides are dabbled with pure white square or rectangular architecture. These purely Spanish style houses fit right into the mountainsides. On the mountains the pine trees, are mixed with almonds, figs, Grapes,Olives and plums.
Orange trees fill the lower level's along with almonds. On hot days the clouds are not white because of the dirty water in Africa, I was told the collection of the water from that area makes the clouds here grey almost dirty looking and rest on top of the low mountains, and are sprinkled about in the mainland. All the Ibecincans say that it is a sign of how hot it will be tomorrow. They almost have a pink tinge at times.

I am enjoying the simple pleasures the cultural structure that Cathys family has, but I am not enjoying the fact that I am still out of work. It is pressing on me heavily.. aside from that the pleasure I find daily is what I see, and how I have learned about this Ibizan life.

I really enjoy the streets in the old port area, tiny pathways for walking mixed with apartments or flats, and piso's they say and below, restuarants, bars, stores shops and various old artisans. The forms too are all square or rectangular, and mostly white in colors, with splashes of vibrant boganvillias here and there and a catus thrown in for a different texture.

My eating with Cathy, Abuela, and Jaime has become a ritual. I enjoy and am very greatful for her generosity and hospitality. They feel as if I am part of there family. With Ivan always with me, around me. Eating in my house, playing. And me trying to lend a hand to help in whatever I can to repay for now her offers of food.


One day we went for a ride, I looked at the mountainsides and thought this description and how to remember the feeling I have when I see this place, But the best was stopping in the countryside the way we did when my mother and father were alive running into a field and picking fresh fruit rapidly and running into the car.
Cahty and I did just that. We stopped, picked fresh figs and ran fast back to the car.
Later we refrigerated them, the sweet black skin and pale pink flesh inside is scrumptious with bits of goat cheese stuffed in the middle.We enjoy this as a dessert many times now. I look so forward to that, it makes me remember my mother.

And how I wish she was still with me.

One day Cathy went away for a long time, when she returned she had buckets upon buckets of fresh plums yellow and red. It came from her property in San Miguel. Oranges too but not many and they were small, its not the season, but generous as she is offered me a huge plate. I have been suckling on these for more than a week now.

I really want work, I want to do something very nice for Cathy, she is always thinking about me, worries that I don't eat and offers daily. I honestly love her. Its not just the generosity its her ways, additude, sometimes she is snotty. I love it, not with me but with Jaime. I can tell who really is the boss.

Abuela, truly loves me she is always hugging me, telling Ivan to be nice to me. She spanks him, she is the only one that does. Abeula is filled with stories, and shares food experiences with me too. She is forever in the garden, working in her black clothes still carring on the old tradition of Older European women who wore black.
My Nonnie wore black all the time that was the way. When you are past a certain age no longer in young fresh colors. I tried to tell her Abuela we live in 2008 you can wear what you want. So Occasionally she will put on a colorfull blouse but not often.


I know when I leave this place its going to super difficult. Cathy will be heart broken, she is always around me always asking me to do this and that with her, I think she knows something is not right, at the moment.

But That much later maybe tomorrow I explain:

I had a job offer for cleaning a mansion on Sats its long hours not much but i need work. I took it, plus this gal I met from Englands boy friend wants me to clean his place too. But the experiences so far?>>> WAIT AND SEE is what I say?

David called me on Monday afternoon, I was in town, returning some shoes I bought, and talking to two more places. He wanted me to come clean his house, I asked for a later time he said no. I said How about tomorrow morning, I have a job interview and after I can come and clean... Tues came, I went to the interview, nothing much about that, Walked to Davids and he was busy told me to come back later. He messaged about nine at night said sorry come tomorrrow which is today. I was about ready to walk over when Cathy said call him. Good thing because he was not home and said maybe Friday.

ITS IBIZA, but as far as the images, the sites, the real people, the food its a great place.